Jada Pinkett Smith has spoken candidly about her mother, Adrienne Banfield-Norris, and how physical touch was something that had been missing from their relationship.
The Matrix Revolutions star reflected on her childhood and how her mother wasn’t very affectionate throughout it during Wednesday’s episode of Red Table Talk.
Hosted by Ms Banfield-Norris, Jada, and her daughter Willow Smith, the program discussed the importance of a mother, daughter relationship and featured a conversation with Kelly McDaniel, counsellor and author of Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal From Lost Nurturance, Protection and Guidance.
According to Ms Banfield-Norris, one of the things that was missing in her relationship with both Jada and her own mother was “touch,” as she barely cuddled with each of them.
“Very rarely will you see Jada and I even touch,” she said. “Hug, you know.”
Jada chimed in agreement and said: “And if we do, it’s awkward.”
Ms Banfield-Norris went on to emphasise that point, noting how in her family, they “didn’t hug” or “touch,” despite how much love they felt.
“We knew we were loved,” she said. “But it just wasn’t that kind of nurturing touch.”
She then pointed at her granddaughter, recalling how when Willow was a child, she “always wanted to cuddle and sleep” next to family.
Even though the 21-year-old singer acknowledged how Ms Banfield-Norris let her “sleep with” her and “cuddled a lot,” this wasn’t the case for Jada and her mother.
“She never cuddled with me,” Jada added.
However, Ms Banfield-Norris noted that when she physically affectionate with Willow, she realised how much she “missed” out on when raising Jada.
“It felt so good to be able to have that,” she explained. “And I never had it. When I had it with you [Willow], then I missed it with Jada. I realised how much I missed with her.”
Jada then noted that the “beauty” of her mother’s realisation was the fact that things were “able to change” because of it.
“That’s what this is all about, is trying to break the pattern,” Ms Banfield-Norris concluded.
Elsewhere in the interview, Ms Banfield-Norris opened up about her relationship with her mother and the environment that she grew up in. The television host recalled how her mother gave her too much “guidance” sometimes, but not enough physical affection.
“I was the youngest of four,” she said. “I needed more touch and cuddling, and that didn’t happen. And then there was the overprotection with the guidance of just having in her mind how she wanted things to be. And her expectations.”
