HRVATSKA LA VISTA
It says plenty about Croatia’s ongoing ability to punch above their weight that, of the nations ready to contest the Human Rights World Cup semi-finals, it is Morocco, a country with a population more than nine times higher than the homeland of Luka Modric and pals, who are considered the plucky little runts of the last four litter. While the Atlas Lions have continued to amaze on a deceptively serene route to the semis that has seen them concede just one goal, few seasoned football-watchers seem even remotely surprised to see Croatia still in the last four mix because … well, because they are Croatia.
The T-1000 of international teams, this ageing, streetwise bunch of fearless, dead-eyed footballing assassins never know when they’re beaten. Having reached the last four of the tournament again, despite “winning” just one game in Qatar, Croatia are currently on a run of four consecutive World Cup shootout wins. “We are raised as fighters, giving our best and that is the recipe for success,” roared goalkeeper Dominik Livakovic after his side had come from behind to remove the spring from Neymar’s samba step, sending him and his Brazilian teammates packing.
The unenviable job of trying to deposit Croatia into Fifa’s Big Vat O’ Molten Metal now falls to Argentina, a team who have also demonstrated no little doggedness of their own as they sh1thoused their way to these semis. But while their win over the Netherlands at times resembled nothing so much as a cartoon brawl with assorted fists, boots and yellow cards emerging from a big cloud of dust, manager Lionel Scaloni has explained they were only doing what was required to win and pointed out it actually takes two to perform that most Argentinian of dances, the tango. “The previous game was played, you know, the way we had to play it,” he told reporters during his pre-match pow-wow. “But from both teams. And that’s football. And sometimes, you know, things can happen like the previous game. There can be arguments, more challenging times. But that’s all. That’s why there is a referee, to make justice.”
On the subject of the various Argentinian post-match moans about the particularly card-happy and fussy Spanish referee, Mateu Lahoz, who has since been sent to the airport by Fifa, Scaloni insisted his players were not the sore winners many think. “That’s very far from who we actually are as a team, as a squad and as the way we represent our nation,” he sighed, taking time out from supervising target practice that involved various players taking potshots at a dugout full of mannequins wearing tablecloths sourced from a nearby Italian restaurant. While a win for Argentina would perhaps serve as another step in Lionel Messi’s journey towards cementing his status as the greatest player of all time (or just the second best in Argentinian history), in his opposite number Modric he faces a fellow legendary Ballon d’Or-winning No 10 hoping to drive his team to HRWC glory. By close of play, however this one ends, only one of these diminutive legends will be left standing tall.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
It’s time for the first semi-final! Join Scott Murray for live MBM updates from Argentina 1-1 Croatia (aet, 3-4 pens), kicking off at 7pm GMT.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“I am disappointed that there is continuing coverage of this matter (as well as some highly fictionalised versions of events) and extremely surprised that anyone on the staff would contribute to it. Coach [Gregg] Berhalter has always said issues that arise with the team will stay ‘in house’ so we can focus on team unity and progress” – USA! USA!! USA!!! midfielder Gio Reyna hits back at reports most definitely out of the house that he was almost sent home from the HRWC for a perceived lack of effort against Wales. “I am someone who plays with pride and passion,” he added. “I am also a very emotional person, and I fully acknowledge that I let my emotions get the best of me and affect my training and behaviour after learning about my limited role. Thereafter, I shook off my disappointment and gave everything I had on and off the field.”
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
I am writing to express my disappointment after reading Big Website’s interview with the Mac Allister family. The reporter inexcusably failed to address the incident several years ago when the family went on holiday and Alexis’s brother, Kevin, was accidentally left home alone and single-handedly fended off a pair of dimwitted burglars” – Jonathan Jucker.
Even the c0ckles of the coldest of hearts could not fail to have been warmed by the story of John Stones bringing home ‘Dave’ the stray cat from Qatar (yesterday’s Football Daily). This is by no means a World Cup first – in 1962, Brazilian legend Garrincha came home from Chile with a rascally black dog who had not only invaded the pitch during Brazil’s clash with England, but also left his calling card on our very own Jimmy Greaves” – Allastair McGillivray.
Re: Karl Baxter’s surplus England World Cup winner T-shirts (yesterday’s News, Bits and Bobs). While Football Daily may not be interested, I’d suggest he could do a healthy trade in places like Aberystwyth, Kilmarnock, Strabane and Galway” – Bryan Paisley.
Football isn’t the only sport with a World Cup, and England must have won one in something this year. T20 cricket for a start, but probably also junior tiddlywinks or something as well. Just flog the footy merch to those fans and hope it doesn’t mention Fifa anywhere” – Robin Hazlehurst.
Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … Jonathan Jucker.
RECOMMENDED LOOKING
T1te’s dancing shoes! Louis van Gaal’s trebuchet! Bono’s headphones! Feast your eyes on David Squires’s latest HRWC cartoon.
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