A Londoner who lives in Bangkok has made a spirited defence of Dick Van Dyke's much-maligned cockney accent as a chimney-sweep in Mary Poppins, which was mentioned in last week's column.
In an email, Danny Speight, who was brought up in Woolwich on the southern bank of the Thames, refers to Van Dyke's accent as "rather nice, although a bit musical and with a touch of southern Irish thrown in. Then again, Mary Poppins was a musical".
Speight believes the widespread criticism of Van Dyke's accent in the 1964 film could be a result of "reverse snobbism from fellow actors who had studied the London accent at RADA (Royal Academy of Dramatic Art)" and felt they were the only ones to handle such roles.
"I think he would have passed muster on the East London music hall stage," adds Speight.
So there you are, a rare display of support for Van Dyke's cockney persona.
Interestingly, in a 2003 poll by Empire magazine of the worst accents ever in film, Van Dyke came in second behind Sean Connery whose Irish cop in The Untouchables at times sounded uncomfortably like a Scottish cop. However, it did not stop Connery winning the Oscar for best supporting actor.
Of course it was Mary Poppins that produced one of the strangest and longest song titles ever, "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious", something of a mouthful by any standards. It is a nonsense word but generally interpreted as meaning something wonderful.
It certainly created a wonderful football headline 36 years later in 2000 when heavy underdogs Inverness Caledonian Thistle upset mighty Celtic in the Scottish Cup. It prompted the Sun newspaper to come out with the splendid "Super Caley go Ballistic Celtic are atrocious".
London calling
I would be remiss not to mention some of the actors closely associated with London accents. Immediately springing to mind is the late Bob Hoskins who wasn't even born in London, but who made his name with a cockney accent in underworld films like The Long Good Friday and Mona Lisa.
Possibly the most natural cockney accent I have heard on film is that of Alan Ford as the gangster "Brick Top" in Snatch. He is deliciously evil as the racketeer who has a nasty habit of feeding people he dislikes to the pigs. When asked if he takes sugar in his tea he responds, "No thank you, I'm sweet enough''.
We must not forget Michael Caine and Ray Winston who are both London born and bred and definitely sound like it. Caine told Time magazine that for his breakthrough role in the 1966 film Alfie, he had to tinker with his cockney accent and redo dozens of lines for American audiences. "I had to make cockney understandable to Americans. One of the things about cockney is that you speak twice as fast at Americans. Americans speak very slow."
Multilingual assassin
Someone who has displayed remarkable versatility when it comes to accents is British actor Jodie Comer in her role as Villanelle, a ruthless Russian assassin in the television series Killing Eve. Her primary accent is Russian which she handles brilliantly and also is convincing with French, Italian, American, German, Mandarin and many more.
Born in Liverpool, Comer has a distinctive Merseyside accent which often surprises people who half expect a heavy Russian intonation they associate her with. Comer says she hates it when fans ask her to do one of her accents, saying "my insides just go 'urghhh' and my toes curl up".
Welcome to Merseyside
A really strong Scouse accent can be tricky even for British people to comprehend. When English footballer Wayne Rooney, who hails from Merseyside, first emerged on the scene, ESPN interviews with him carried English subtitles for the benefit of American audiences.
About 20 years ago I was with a group of Thai journalists in Liverpool and on occasion they looked at me for guidance when they couldn't understand a word being said. I wasn't much help but did advise them that if a Scouser says "gerrus a bevvy, willya?" it might be an idea to buy him a beer -- and make it quick.
The southern Geordie
In the UK television series Vera, Brenda Blethyn who plays Northumberland detective Vera Stanhope does a decent job with her Geordie accent, considering she hails from the Kent seaside town of Ramsgate in the south. She was told at the start not to overdo the accent because the series was being sold internationally and they wanted to avoid using subtitles. According to Blethyn, she receives the most criticism from southerners who prefer a broader Geordie accent.
Vera, who regularly calls people "pet" and "love'' has to be the most unlikely TV detective you will ever come across, invariably dressed in shabby mackintosh, floppy fisherman's hat, scarf and Wellington boots. But when you consider at the age of 76 she is still catching criminals it doesn't really matter what accent she adopts.
End of the line
Finally, a cockney tale from the London Underground. A rather posh lady fell asleep on a District Line train and was woken up by a guard after reaching the end of the line at Upminster, about 25 kilometres from central London. She asked the guard "Excuse me, is this Aldgate East?" To which the guard replied in a broad cockney accent "Nah lady, it's all get aht!"
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