At her worst, Anna Roberts was drinking three bottles of wine every day. The first thing the 27-year-old did when she woke up was drink a glass, followed by her morning coffee. "It was as if it was medicine," Anna said.
The mum-of-two's issues with alcohol dependency started after she had her first child. It was only ever wine, she said, and was "just a glass in the evening to chill out." She suffered with post-natal depression and found a glass of wine in the evening helped settle her anxiety.
But, over the years, it increased to the point where she was drinking three bottles a day and spending a significant sum to keep her addiction going. The stay-at-home mum to a boy, 8 and girl, 6, hid it and only drank when her two children were in school. She described waking up everyday feeling hungover, until she had her first drink which would set her straight. You can get more real-life stories and other news updates straight to your inbox by subscribing to our newsletters here.
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Anna, from Ferndale in the Rhondda, said: "I always enjoyed a drink. Just a glass in the evening to chill out. I suffered a lot with anxiety especially after my son was born, I has post natal depression. I started drinking to sort of self medicate."
"I was taking the kids to school and I was trying to keep up with everything but my house would get to a point that I couldn't keep on top of it. I was making sure they were washed and fed and in school but that was it. It was hard to hide it, when I would fall asleep in the evening, I wouldn't be asleep, I'd be passed out.
"It got to a point where I sat there one day and I said I can't remember what has happened today. I didn't know what I had done, I remembered getting dressed and that was it."
She attempted to hide the problem from her husband of seven years, Richard Roberts, but described how painful it was for him to watch her deal with the alcohol dependency. Her consumption of alcohol spiralled and she eventually started to show physical symptoms of the alcohol affecting her body.
"Last year my physical health started to decline. My legs started to go numb, I was having spasms in my legs and arms. The doctors thought I had multiple sclerosis, I had lots and lots of tests and they said your blood tests are showing you are drinking. It goes to show how serious the damage can be - that was only from drink.
"I think at that point I was drinking from the time I got up in the morning until I went to bed. I didn't feel drunk but everyday was like a hangover until I had that first drink. As a parent I was terrified they would take my children off me."
The thought of losing her children motivated her to get help and at this time Anna contacted the local NHS mental health crisis team. They said she couldn't be admitted with them as she was dependent on alcohol. So, instead, she got in touch with drug and alcohol addiction charity Barod, which referred her to the local community drug and alcohol team.
"They said we can refer you for an inpatient detox - that was August last year, and I have been sober ever since."
Anna completed a seven day impatient detox at Hafan Y Coed in Llandough - and the first few days were focused on the withdrawal detox. Then she started the therapy. She said: "It was nice meeting other people, there was one other woman, she was a mum like me, and you just would never know."
It is still early days for Anna and she admitted she was slightly worried about Christmas due to it being a time when more people enjoyed parties and alcohol. She added: "At Christmas time I thought I would find it quite hard but my husband doesn't drink now. I have been out to pubs and stuff and if it gets a bit much for me I show my face for an hour and come home.
"When I was discharged from hospital the first shop I did I picked up an alcohol free bottle of wine and my husband said to me, 'do you think that is a good idea', but still to this day I haven't touched it. I am still worried about the taste. It tastes so much like the real thing I didn't want to make my cravings worse."
Anna said one of the things that kept her mind on track and away from alcohol was knowing she was on medication that would make her ill if she drank alcohol. She also has new measures to control her anxiety, like going for walks - and also attends an adult tap dancing class.
"I want to get the message out there what alcohol can do to you because it is so normal to drink. I am not saying it is a bad thing but I want people to know you can come forward and get help.
"I know it is terrifying. It's when you are in that place, you don't know where to go, you are pretty much at rock bottom. There are so many opportunities and organisations that I didn't know about and they are down to help people. I haven't been to an AA meeting, it doesn't have to be like that, I have a key worker and we go for a coffee. There is help out there.
"My body feels normal now, alcohol is a depressant anyway so stopping that has made me feel so much better. I get out and about now and if I feel anxious I go for a walk."
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