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The Guardian - AU
The Guardian - AU
Lifestyle
Eleanor Gordon-Smith

I want sex more often than my husband does – what can we do?

Eleanor GordonSmith
Painting of a woman kneeling in a flowing pink dress reaching up toward a man in armour, in a forest setting
‘If to him, sex is definitionally a test of performance, it’s no wonder you might differ in how much time you want to spend at it,’ writes Eleanor Gordon-Smith. Painting: Lamia by John Waterhouse. Illustration: Painters/Alamy

My husband and I have been married for five years and are having trouble with our sex life. From the beginning of our marriage (we only started having sex after marriage) I wanted sex more frequently than him. In the first year or so of marriage we’d have sex two to three times a week which I enjoyed, although sometimes hoped for more.

A few years into our marriage my husband had a very stressful time at work. Sex dropped to roughly once a week, typically on the weekends. He picked up running to help deal with the stress and really enjoyed it.

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