Ah, Boris Johnson – such a safe pair of hands for any eventuality or crisis, national or international, but where you can really rely on him is in matters of discretion, judgment and not taking the biscuit. No, no, we’re not idiots, and that is not what any of us think. We know our way around this man and his traits: we know there are question marks over his truthfulness, but never any doubt as to his self-interest and brass neck. So come on, the fact that the former prime minister has managed to surprise, even shock, anyone with his resignation honours list is surely cause for some grim admiration. How is it possible for Johnson to disappoint anyone, when our expectations were already so low? It’s like a superpower.
His list was revealed by the Times, although it has yet to be officially confirmed, presumably because officials are still speechless. It is said to be exceptionally long: 100 names, set against 60 nominations from Theresa May and 62 from David Cameron. There are four sitting MPs on it, which, being unprecedented, raises a few questions about the long game: is the plan that they sit in the Lords and the Commons, just for the thrill of upturning the constitutional matrix? Or will they step down from their elected positions, so that someone else, maybe some charming, floppy blond rascal, can stand in one of their seats, should his own start to look dicey?
