What I love about social media in 2025 is how there’s always a new source of insecurity to develop – should I fibremaxx? Do I need a deep-plane facelift? Am I a narcissist? Are my ankles betraying me? This week’s is: cleaning the bread knife. Apparently the (mostly British) habit of just wiping our breadknives after use, possibly on our sleeves, and putting them back in the drawer, as showcased in online skits and cartoons, is “gross”, unhygienic and the reason people refuse to eat outside their own home.
As far as I’m aware, our bread knife has never seen a drawer. It doesn’t even get wiped, just washed when it meets an especially oily focaccia. It lives on the breadboard with several weeks’ worth of crumbs and I thought that was normal – surely there are no bacteria in crumbs? I still think it’s normal – plenty of people online admitted to the cursory wipe. But they did so in a way that made it sound like their most transgressive, depraved habit, adding to my growing unease that whenever one of these hygiene “controversies” rears its head, I’m on the side of grossness.
