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The Guardian - US
The Guardian - US
Karen Yuan and Lauren Gould

‘Tastes like Play-Doh’: the best (and worst) chocolate bars – tasted and ranked

bars of chocolate on counter with pink blanket
Testers’ reviews ranged from ‘What a treat’ to ‘Tasted rancid.’ Photograph: Tracy Allison/The Guardian

Finding the perfect chocolate bar is a bit like dating. Some bars are an acquired taste, while others are love at first sight.

Luckily, and perhaps overwhelmingly, good chocolate only seems to be getting better. One in six new chocolates now claim to be “premium”, according to some recent research. Grocery shelves across the country carry artisanal, fair trade, organic, bean to bar, handcrafted, single origin, you-name-the-buzzword chocolate.

Which ones actually taste good? To find out, we held a blind taste test of 10 of the top chocolate brands in the US. Most of these are available in major grocery stores. (No Dubai chocolate in this list though.)

Our testers’ reviews ended up ranging from “What a treat” to “Tasted rancid”. Only four chocolate bars were deemed above average. Keep scrolling to read all of their reactions.

***

The very best chocolate bars in the US at a glance

  • Best milk chocolate bar:
    Endangered Species 48% Cocoa

$58 for a 12-pack at Amazon
  • Best dark chocolate bar:
    Theo 70% Cacao

$42 for a 6-pack at Amazon
  • Best vegan chocolate bar:
    Hu Kitchen Cashew Butter + Raspberry

$50 for a variety 8-pack at Amazon
  • Best flavored chocolate bar:
    Beyond Good 72% Cocoa

$30 for a variety 4-pack at Beyond Good

***

How we taste-tested chocolate bars

We recruited 10 volunteers from our New York office to eat a lot of chocolate during the work day, which may be the easiest pitch we have ever made. We focused on 10 independent chocolate brands, prioritizing those with fair trade or direct trade claims. While the world of ethical chocolate is murky, we looked for verifying media and certifications from industry watchdogs, including Fair Trade, Fair for Life and Ecocert. We avoided mass-market companies with a poor record, such as Mars and Nestlé.

For the test, people ate small squares of the bestselling bar from each brand. They wore blindfolds while tasting to avoid packaging bias. After each sample, blindfolds came off and tasters jotted down their honest thoughts on an anonymous paper form, rating overall impression, flavor and aftertaste on a score of 0 stars (worst) to 5 stars (best). Tasters had strawberries on hand to pair and palate cleanse with.

In the end, only four chocolates scored above 3 stars – read on to see which ones.

***

Best milk chocolate:
Endangered Species 48% Cocoa

$58 for pack of 12 at Amazon $68 for pack of 12 at Target

Tastes like holiday chocolate.

Endangered Species’ ingredient lists are short and simple, with chocolate liquor and cocoa butter doing most of the work. It claims to be the only “ocean plastic neutral” chocolate company, meaning that a pound of plastic is apparently removed from oceans and rivers for every pound used in its production. The brand also donates 10% of its net profits to wildlife conservation and habitat protection.

What we loved: The 48% milk chocolate bar was an instant crowd-pleaser. For several tasters, it was their favorite of the entire lineup. Multiple people praised its “very creamy, not overly sweet” taste and balanced sugar-to-chocolate ratio. “What a treat,” said one taster. Another: “10 out of 10.”

Testers kept coming back to how comforting it tasted. “It tastes like holiday chocolate,” one person noted, while another called it “such a relief after the last few”. Others started thinking practically (or dreamily), saying it would taste even better as chocolate chips or melted into hot chocolate.

In the spirit of transparency: the bar’s biggest fans admitted they were biased towards all milk chocolate.

***

Best dark chocolate:
Theo 70% Cacao

$42 for pack of six at Amazon $64 for pack of 12 at Theo Chocolate

I’d snack on these while watching TV and then realize I finished it all.

This Seattle-based chocolate maker takes its name from the Latin word for cocoa tree, Theobroma cacao. Theo produces its chocolate in-house and claims to have been the first organic and fair trade-certified chocolate factory in North America. Since 2005, it has also paid over $2.3m into “fair trade cocoa development funds”, which you can read up on in the annual impact report the brand publishes.

What we loved: Several tasters called this 70% dark chocolate the “best one so far”, praising its balanced flavor and smooth texture. “Uncontroversial. Just good,” one of them said. A few testers noted how approachable it tasted, especially for a dark chocolate. “A good introduction to dark chocolate, easy, accessible,” one taster said.

They felt it would pair well with wine but would also be dangerously snackable on its own. “Be careful how much you buy because it’s very easy to go through,” one said. Another agreed that they’d nibble on a bar “while watching TV and realize I finished it all”.

It’s a shame that … Not a dealbreaker, but couple tasters found the flavor “mid”.

***

Best vegan chocolate:
Hu Kitchen Cashew Butter + Raspberry

$6 for one bar at Vitacost $50 for variety pack of eight at Amazon
  • Flavor score: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

  • Cacao percentage: 70%

  • Chocolate type: Dark

  • Sustainability cred: Certified by Fairtrade America

Something different in a good way.

Hu Kitchen’s chocolate bars offer a treat for health nuts and nut butter lovers. All of its chocolate is vegan and gluten-free, and made from just four organic ingredients: cacao, unrefined coconut sugar, hazelnut and cocoa butter. Hu is known for its bars filled with creamy nut butters, including almond, cashew and hazelnut.

What we loved: Hu Kitchen’s raspberry dark chocolate bar with cashew butter won our testers over with its complexity. Most tasters liked the fruity flavor, though one taster felt it took a while to taste it. “But once you get to the fruit, it’s good.” Another taster called it “something different in a good way”.

It’s a shame that … Some testers weren’t fans of the raspberry bar’s chewiness, likely due to the cashew butter – one even noted it felt like eating straight peanut butter. Another found the texture unexpected but not unwelcome: “It was kind of fluffy inside. I didn’t hate it. I’m not sure how I feel about it.”

***

Best flavored chocolate:
Beyond Good

$23 for variety pack of four at Amazon $30 for variety pack of four at Beyond Good

I’ll marry this one.

Beyond Good sources its chocolate from Uganda and Madagascar, and its site shares a map of farmers it says it sources from. Since Beyond Good produces two lines of chocolate, we asked testers to try something from each: a dark chocolate hazelnut from its main line, and a vanilla bean (made with heirloom cocoa and vanilla caviar) from its microbatches.

What we loved: Beyond Good’s bars captured the hearts of many of our testers for their bold flavors and crunchy textures. Especially the hazelnut bar: “I’ll marry this one,” one participant said. “I’m a fan of hazelnut, and the salt is a bonus,” said another, referring to the sea salt.

It’s a shame that … The texture wasn’t for everyone, with some finding the bars too tough and hard to chew. One of our testers noted: “It kind of hits that part of the back of your throat when you eat something sour.”

***

Other chocolate bars our tasters tried

Our taste testers found six of the 10 chocolate bars divisive or worse. One bar was so unappealing that a tester spit out their square without finishing it.

Could you still end up liking these? Chocolate is chocolate, so probably, but you’ve been fairly warned.

Quotes have been edited for clarity.

Maeve Moon Rocks Truffle Chocolate

$42 for pack of six at Maeve Chocolate $87 for variety pack of 12 at Amazon
  • Flavor score: ⭐⭐⭐

  • Chocolate type: Milk

The verdicts: “Popping in my mouth felt strange.” “My favorite, but I like Pop Rocks.” “Too soft, crackly, crunchy.” “I do like the popping that kind of grew on me, but I wouldn’t eat it again.” “Too sweet.”

***

Blue Stripes Pure Dark Chocolate

$14 for pack of two at Amazon
  • Flavor score: ⭐⭐⭐

  • Chocolate type: Dark

The verdicts: “I would have it with wine; it’s a very intense flavor.” “Classic dark as it’s supposed to be.” “For someone who loves a good dark chocolate, this is a good one.” “Hard to break down.” “A good crunch.” “The sugar ratio was off.”

***

Divine Chocolate Deliciously Smooth Dark Chocolate

$6 for one bar at Amazon $7 for one bar at Divine Chocolate
  • Flavor score: ⭐⭐

  • Chocolate type: Dark

The verdicts: “Like something you’d get at CVS.” “Candy left behind the day after Halloween.” “It’s kind of bland.” “The texture is fine, but I don’t know what the flavor is.”

***

TCHO Perfect Matcha Chocolate

$5 for one bar at iHerb $20 for pack of three at Amazon
  • Flavor score: ⭐⭐

  • Chocolate type: White

The verdicts: “Tastes like Play-Doh.” “Has a tea note in the beginning, but it’s quickly drowned out by the sweetness.” “My three-year-old daughter would love this.” “Too sweet.” “Think it’s supposed to be pistachio?”

***

Spring & Mulberry Mixed Berry Date-Sweetened Chocolate

$9 for one bar at Spring & Mulberry $33 for pack of three at Spring & Mulberry
  • Flavor score:

  • Chocolate type: Dark

The verdicts: “Really dry. The chocolate had some flavor, but whatever was on top was really dry and chewy and tasted pretty old.” “It had a weird combo of textures, and the fruit running through it almost tasted rancid.” “It was really sour.”

***

Alter Eco Total Blackout Chocolate

$25 for pack of four at Amazon $43 for pack of 12 at Walmart
  • Flavor score: No stars

  • Chocolate type: Dark

The verdicts: “I wouldn’t know it was chocolate unless you told me.” “A sour note to it. Pure bitterness.” “Eugh.” “I would eat it with something else.” “The texture was good.” “Can I get a napkin? Is there a trash can?” “I can’t even finish chewing it.”

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