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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
Julia Banim

'I kept my baby a secret from my family - I didn't want to upset my sister'

A woman was so conscious of upsetting her older sister that she claims she went right through her pregnancy without telling her parents - only letting them know about the baby after she'd already given birth.

Before splitting from her husband, her 36-year-old sister, Jenny* had been trying to have a baby without success for ten years, and was sadly told that her chances of carrying a child to term were very slim.

Over the years, she noticed Jenny changing, becoming bitter and resentful as those around her began having children of their own.

At first, Jenny became "sad and depressed" when hearing about others starting families. However, after their cousin became pregnant with twins less than a year after having her first baby, her unhappiness turned to aggression.

Things apparently became so bad that the cousin has had to block all contact with Jenny, and won't go to family parties if there's a chance their paths will cross.

Jenny previously became aggressive towards their cousin after learning she was expecting twins (Stock Photo) (Getty Images)

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Last year, Jenny's 27-year-old sister discovered she was pregnant. Her husband was thrilled, but all she could think of was how her sibling would react.

Taking to Reddit, the new mum wrote: "One day, when I was visiting, I was subtly trying to talk to my mum about the idea of me having a baby.

"Jenny overheard and came bursting in saying that me getting pregnant would be one of the worse things I could do to her as a sister. She then started crying and I apologised and left.

"My mum sent me a text saying that I was wrong to bring something like that up knowing how Jenny is and I just started crying. After that, I made a decision to just keep my pregnancy a secret and for nine months that's what I did."

However, she recently gave birth to a baby girl and, knowing that she couldn't hide her secret any longer, sent her parents a text, letting them know they were grandparents.

By the time her parents found out about her pregnancy, she'd already given birth (Stock Photo) (Getty Images)

At first, her parents assumed she was playing some sort of joke. However, when she FaceTimed them to prove that her daughter was indeed real, they became "very angry".

The poster, who goes by the username u/Fantastic_Smile5462, continued: "They were hurt because not only did I hide something like this from them but that my husband's parents knew and were very involved.

"I lost it and told them that it's what they deserved after robbing me of the opportunity to enjoy my pregnancy because I was stressing out about how Jenny would react if/when she found out.

"I'm starting to feel guilty because I know my parents are trying to be there for Jenny who's going through something she can't control."

However, the poster's fellow Reddit users have reassured her that she shouldn't feel guilty. While they certainly sympathise with Jenny's difficulties, they believe her parents' enabling behaviour isn't helping with the situation at all.

One person wrote: "Jenny needs to stay in therapy for more than three sessions. Your parents are enabling her like an addict. Her infertility is tragic but it does not dictate your family’s life and your happiness.

"Block them on socials if you post there. Celebrate as much as you want. Congratulations on your baby. It may be good to reach out to your cousin for support."

Another said: "I can only imagine your sister's grief and the hurt she’s experiencing but at the same time, it really sounds like your parents just need to get her into therapy ASAP. It’s not healthy for anyone and it’s also robbed your parents of being able to share that special moment with you, too.

"Once things have settled, it sounds like you need a talk with your parents again - perhaps even in a setting where there is no chance of your sister overhearing (probably in a public place would be best, even a local park where there is space should things go a bit south again)."

Do you have a pregnancy-related story to share? We pay for stories. Email us at julia.banim@reachplc.com

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