When I first moved to the US from the UK, having an English accent was an asset. Back in the pre-Brexit era, it signalled sophistication and intelligence. Now? Not so much. Still, for some deep-seated reason probably best discussed with a therapist, I desperately want my very American toddler to develop an English accent. So, a little while ago, I devised a cunning plan: elongate her vowel sounds via the power of Peppa Pig.
This, I’ll have you know, was not a lazy excuse for sticking her in front of a screen. It was a science-based, data-driven decision: there is endless anecdata that suggests American children are acquiring British accents because of the hugely popular TV show. (Linguists have cast doubt on these claims, but who listens to experts, eh?) So why not give it a go? Not to mention, Peppa Pig initially seemed a lot less annoying than American shows such as Daniel Tiger’s Neighbourhood, which are full of cloying life lessons about how to navigate your emotions. There don’t seem to be any life lessons in Peppa Pig: she just calls her dad fat all the time and jumps in muddy puddles. And, more importantly, she pronounces “to-mah-to” correctly.
Twelve thousand episodes of Peppa later, I am here to say that my experiment has gone very wrong. Peppa Pig has moments of hilarious pettiness (the whistling competition with Suzy Sheep being a classic – if you know, you know) but, in general, she is an annoying brat. Clearly, I am not the only one who thinks this. After Googling: “Is it just me or is Peppa Pig irredeemably irritating?” I discovered a whole world of Peppa-haters out there. Indeed, the Wall Street Journal published a piece earlier this year declaring that American parents are turning on Peppa because she’s a bad influence.
She has certainly not been a good linguistic influence, that’s for sure. My “to-may-to”-loving daughter hasn’t developed even the faintest hint of an English accent. Instead, she’s developed a habit of saying “I’m Peppa Pig!” and then snorting loudly. Still, I have had my revenge on the Pig family in a roundabout way. I recently introduced the kid to bacon.
• Arwa Mahdawi is a Guardian columnist
