The TikToker Leroy Lupton went viral this week after filming himself in Aldi trying to bag his shopping faster than the checkout staff could scan it. The pure speed of Aldi’s checkout process is part of the shop’s appeal – managers call this the “thrill at the till” – but as Lupton shows, it can easily overwhelm some shoppers.
Personally, however, upon watching Lupton’s videos I was slightly appalled by his sheer amateurishness. In his videos he is badly equipped and poorly organised. I, on the other hand, am the undisputed world leader at beating Aldi staff at the checkout. I’m a regular, and perhaps my proudest moment ever came on 9 March 2019 (I remember because I tweeted it). This was the day when I managed to bag my items with such violent efficiency that not only did the guy at the checkout offer me a heartfelt “Great work, buddy,” but my oldest son squealed “DADDY! You’re so FAST!” at me. When I die, I would like my grave to be inscribed with the legend: “Quite good at Aldi.”
