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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Lifestyle
Lizzie Cernik

How we met: ‘Everyone thought we were dating. It’s rare for two men to be so close’

Alexios and Leandro at a climbing wall
‘He pushes me out of my comfort zone,’ says Alexios (left), with Leandro at a climbing wall. Photograph: Handout

Growing up in Greece, Alexios attended the same summer camp in Thessaloniki every year. In 2011, when he was 17, he became a camp counsellor. “I was in charge of the activities like sports and swimming,” he says. It wasn’t long before he became best friends with Leandro, a fellow camp counsellor, the same age as him. Leandro says: “I was living in Bulgaria at the time, because of my father’s job, but I’d also grown up in Greece and gone to the camp every year. It had a private beach and a beautiful hill covered in pines. It was a great experience to return to.”

At camp, Alexios quickly noticed how popular Leandro was. “Everyone wanted to be his friend,” he says. “One day, I went to his tent to say hello. We ended up listening to music together and it all started from there.” The friendship clicked straight away and the pair soon became inseparable. “Other camp counsellors seemed more reserved, but Alexios was very honest and open,” says Leandro. “It was just so instant. It made it really easy to build a friendship.”

Leandro and Alexios at the YMCA summer camp in Halkidiki, 2011.
Inseparable … Leandro and Alexios at the YMCA summer camp in Halkidiki, 2011. Photograph: Handout

Alexios says they shared the same “stupid sense of humour” and made each other laugh. “He’s also very liberal with affection and would tell me positive things about our friendship. To me, that was very unusual, as most people don’t express themselves that way.”

Throughout the rest of the camp season, they did lots of activities together, including organising the entertainment, writing camp chants for the children and putting on a talent show. “I did the singing; it was horrible,” laughs Leandro. Although he wasn’t musically talented, Alexios says his friend’s showmanship and stage presence carried them through. “Everyone thought we were dating because we were attached at the hip. I think it’s rare for two men to have such a close friendship.”

After leaving the camp, Leandro went to stay with Alexios and his family. “We would play video games, hang out together and eat ice-cream. It sounds cheesy but it was one of those wholesome summers when we did everything together. It felt like I’d known him much longer than I really had,” says Alexios.

In the autumn, they parted ways for university but stayed in touch through Facebook, chatting regularly. In 2015, Leandro moved to London to study and now works as an environmental consultant; while Alexios moved to Sussex in 2016, before joining Leandro in London three years later, where he began a career in the civil service. The pair now meet up once or twice a week.

“I go to his place on Sunday and eat pizzas that he makes,” says Alexios. “He’s an impeccable cook.” They still enjoy doing activities together, such as rock climbing, zip lining, escape rooms and indoor skydiving. “He pushes me out of my comfort zone in a way that’s really fun,” says Alexios. “Beforehand, I do hear a lot of complaining,” laughs Leandro. “But he’s always willing to try something new and he always enjoys it. He also gives me recommendations for films and TV shows he thinks I’ll like – 99% of the time, he’s right.”

Alexios and Leandro have supported each other through difficult times, including relationship breakups, and feel lucky to have each other in their lives. “We are very different in many ways: I am gay and he’s not, plus he’s more active than me,” says Alexios. “But our friendship transcends all of that. I have a very deep, platonic love for him and that can be challenging for men our age to find. I don’t think I’d be the person I am today without him.”

‘Beforehand, I do hear a lot of complaining,’ says Leandro, left, zip lining in London with Alexios in 2019.
‘Beforehand, I do hear a lot of complaining,’ says Leandro, left, zip lining in London with Alexios in 2019. Photograph: Handout

Leandro feels the same way. “It’s nice to meet someone willing to put their heart on the table about the relationship. He is my biggest cheerleader and he’s great with his words and expressing himself. It’s a massive bucketful of love coming my way every time I see him.”

Alexios says that Leandro is his “positive mirror” when he can only see the negatives. “I call him the platonic love of my life. Even if I never find a romantic partner, I feel incredibly lucky to have found this love.”

Callout

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