By 2013, Christine had been working for the Burning Man arts festival for many years. She lived in San Francisco and, though she had an active social life, found it difficult to meet a partner she felt compatible with. “I’d been on plenty of dates, but nothing really clicked,” she says. “I think it’s harder to date after 60. By then, you know what works for you, so you are pickier about who you will go out with.”
When she saw Beto’s profile on a dating site that December, she was immediately interested and thought he seemed a “bit different”. At the time, he was also living in San Francisco, creating software for people living with brain injuries. “She sent me a message to say hello, but I was in New Orleans visiting an ex-girlfriend,” he says. The trip was to clarify that their relationship was completely over, so when he returned, he asked Christine out. “The image she projected was steampunk – lots of brass, leather, top coats. I thought she was really interesting,” he says.
They agreed to meet at an evening art event at a science museum. “He came in his western style – a cowboy raincoat and hat – and I immediately thought he was really attractive,” says Christine. When they started chatting she soon realised he was also “very smart”.
Describing himself as an introvert, Beto worried he might feel left out at the event, but Christine introduced him to some of the artists she knew through Burning Man. “She was very stylish and outgoing. I was definitely charmed,” he says. After a second date, Christine invited him to a Christmas party she was hosting . “My friends loved him,” she says. “One of them mentioned how much he listened and paid attention. I was really taken with him.”
During the party, they realised they had attended many of the same events over the years. “We had overlapping groups of friends but for some reason we had never directly connected,” says Beto. One mutual friend held an annual event in San Francisco called the St Stupid’s Day Parade on April Fools’ Day. “Everyone gets dressed up in crazy outfits and plays games making fun of corporate America,” says Christine. “When we started dating I found an old photo from this event which had both of us in it! We displayed it at our wedding.”
Beto proposed in the summer of 2019, while they were in upstate New York with Christine’s family. “I chose to get down on one knee in front of the family to make it really memorable,” he says. They married surrounded by friends and family at a cannabis ranch in Mendocino in July 2021.
The event was made even more special because they had just been through a difficult year. In 2020, Beto supported his partner through the death of her mother, followed by knee replacement surgery.
While Beto lost his parents when he was in his 20s, he has formed close bonds with Christine’s family. “I now have two nieces, one nephew and six great nieces and nephews,” he says. Beto is retired, and the couple have each kept their own apartments in San Francisco. “We would like to live together but it’s one of the most expensive places in the US to buy,” says Christine. As they get older, they plan to move to the countryside.
Beto loves his wife’s adventurous spirit. “She draws me in to new situations and has a great knowledge of art and aesthetics, which I find really interesting. There is also less drama when you meet when you’re older, because your personalities are that much more settled.”
Christine says she is lucky to have met Beto later in her life. “If I’d met him in my 20s or 30s, I think I would have dated him and moved on because I didn’t want to settle down. When I was younger, I was always trying to change the person but I am done with that now. You learn to make better choices and accept people for who they are.” She appreciates Beto’s “absolute integrity”. “He is also very thoughtful and observant. He always notices the little things and is so kind to me.”
