Immi kept silent about her experience of sexual assault for years before telling her parents what had happened.
She believed it was her fault and worried about getting into trouble if she told anyone.
Immi was only 14 years old.
'A story so hard to tell'
Years later, at the age of 17, Immi wrote a letter to her father detailing her experience of sexual assault and the shame that followed.
"It has become a secret code, hushed through the school lockers and whispered at recess," she wrote, "a story so hard to tell anyone, especially to you, dad".
"I fell into the pattern of thinking it was my fault … he was sweet, everyone liked him, his niceties blinded me, these circumstances made my experience feel invalid."
Immi's father Damian felt sad – and angry – as he heard his daughter read the letter out loud.
But after Immi finished reading, he said he was proud that she decided to speak about her experiences, and told her that none of it was her fault.
How to talk to your child about sexual safety
More than two million women have experienced sexual violence and one million of those have experienced childhood sexual abuse, most commonly by a known person.
Dr Karen Williams, a consultant psychiatrist, and Merrylord Harb, a senior psychologist, have more than 17 years of experience and a wealth of expertise in the treatment of women and girls suffering from complex trauma after experiencing sexual and domestic violence.
They told the ABC why it's so difficult for young survivors like Immi to speak about assault – and what you can do as a parent to ensure your child feels supported.
1. Don't wait for your children to come to you; bring up the subject with them
Sexual assault isn't just a conversation for women – it's a conversation for everyone.
Dr Williams says that addressing the abuse of women has "long been the responsibility of women".
"Culturally and historically, men don't talk about sexual abuse," she adds – not with their daughters and sons, or other men.
Dr Williams says parents need to think about having conversations with their children about sexual health and safety from an early age.
"It doesn't need to be complicated," she says.
For example, when talking to your child about consent, "let them wash their own body parts and explain that no one else should ever touch them unless they give permission".
"Make sure they are taught that if anyone does touch them, they are always safe to come to you for help."
Dr Williams says the language changes when your child becomes a teenager – but the conversations are just as important.
"Talking about sex with your child will not make them more likely to have sex," she explains, "it just teaches them that it is not a topic they ever need to avoid with you.
"Make sure they know that rape does not always look like someone being aggressive and frightening, but can also look like someone refusing to be your boyfriend if you do not have sex."
2. Let your child know you will believe and support them
Statistically, your child is more likely to be harmed by someone they know and trust – like a relative, family friend, or their boyfriend or girlfriend.
"I am still so sad when I hear many parents – who may even believe their child – ignore the disclosure and continue to play happy families," Dr Williams says, "rather than confront or cease contact with an abusive family member."
3. Avoid victim blaming language
Another common experience is victim blaming.
"A lot of women are told, 'You deserve that', or 'You shouldn't have worn that', or 'Why were you drinking'," Ms Harb says.
She says this language can be harmful because women start to believe this narrative and blame themselves, and it also "teaches others not to come forward".
Dr Williams says almost all the survivors of sexual assault that she treats blame themselves for what has happened, even if they were children.
"If you tell your daughter, 'Don't let anyone touch you there,' what you are saying is that if someone does touch you there, you must have let them."
She says, "do not expect your daughter to scream, 'No!', or to fight off their attacker".
4. Your child may not feel comfortable disclosing their trauma
Both experts say many individuals experience immense shame after a sexual assault, making it very difficult to talk about it – especially with people close to them.
Ms Harb says that once a person has survived a sexual assault, "there is an increased likelihood of them developing symptoms of PTSD".
Symptoms can be "debilitating in their day-to-day functioning".
"I can't tell you the amount of young women I have had brought in by concerned parents who are worried about dropping grades, eating disorders, self-harm, anxiety or depression," Dr Williams says.
But when she's alone with survivors, they tell her about the sexual assault they experienced.
"[She begs] me not to breach her trust and not to tell her parents how she was raped by her boyfriend, or touched by a teacher."
She says they are terrified by what has happened to them, and worried their parents will be angry and disappointed.
5. Remember, it takes as much time as it takes to heal from trauma
Dr Williams says as a parent, it is important always to remain calm when speaking with your child about an assault.
"The important thing is to be available and believing," she says.
"Don't expect them to 'get over it' in any particular time frame – trauma symptoms can last months to years.
"Survivors of trauma often feel guilty for not being well, or for not feeling happy".
She also encourages parents to seek advice from trauma specialists and mental health professionals.
Watch Letters To Dad on ABC iview.
