SUPER POWERS
Doctors are pressuring patients to pay for cosmetic surgery with their superannuation, according to Assistant Treasurer Stephen Jones. He’ll reportedly say it today in a speech to the Sydney Insititute, the SMH ($) reports. We can apply to get an early release of our super under compassionate grounds, or if we need it for medically necessary reasons, but Jones reckons it’s going too far. And Treasurer Jim Chalmers said we need to prevent politicians “raiding” our superannuation, The Australian ($) continues, “like allowing billions to be withdrawn from balances during the pandemic” under the Morrison government. Some $38 billion was withdrawn by 3 million people — when you think of the compound interest lost on that money had it stayed invested in super, it’s dizzying.
Chalmers has also flagged he wants to look into super tax concessions, Guardian Australia says, which the treasurer forecasts we’ll spend more on than the aged pension by mid-century. The tax concession allows people to put up to $250,000 a year into their super at a tax rate of just 15%. Chalmers says we shouldn’t be afraid to talk about it when looking at our super industry’s sustainability. Or our budget’s — the Australia Institute found super tax concessions would cost $52.5 billion this financial year, Guardian Australia says. Yikes. But Opposition Leader Peter Dutton reckons the whole thing is just code for more taxation. He expects to see more taxes in May’s budget “when Australians can afford it less and less”.
CUFFING AND PUFFING
The Queensland government will charge kids who breach bail with a criminal offence, the Brisbane Times reports. It’s a 180 for the state government, but Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk said her government had listened to the LNP opposition and the community… and everyone agrees we should criminalise more kids, one assumes. It could cause a human rights emergency in Queensland, advocates told Guardian Australia. It’s already super hard to get bail as a child in the state, and this could cause the young prisoner population — mostly First Nations kids — to balloon. About 80 kids are in adult watch houses right now (!) because all the youth detention centres are beyond full, the paper adds.
Meanwhile, brace for whiplash: Queensland is about to have among the most relaxed drug laws in Australia, The Australian ($) says, with a three-strikes policy for up to a gram of heroin, cocaine or ice before facing a criminal charge. The Palaszczuk government worked closely with police, drug and health experts on it, concluding that it was a health issue that needed to stay out of the courts. Victoria does a similar thing but with fewer chances; NSW’s laws are for a smaller quantity. The ACT is decriminalising possession later this year, and SA allows two grams and a non-expiring offer of a drug program. And Prime Minister Anthony Albanese says we will not be reintroducing the cashless debit card, the ABC reports, even though Nationals Leader David Littleproud says we’ve seen a spike in booze-related violence since it’s been gone. Albo is in WA for the ninth time since he was elected, the broadcaster notes.
NAME AND SHAME
A group of religious scholars have been quietly pushing to reinstate the late cardinal George Pell’s name to St Patrick’s College, a Catholic boys’ school in Victoria. The Australian ($) reports the Pell supporters want to see the name returned to the school building or back onto the honour roll. His name was stripped after Pell was jailed in 2019 for allegations of abusing two choir boys in 1996-97 — the conviction was overturned in the High Court in 2020. But principal Steven O’Connor said the school hasn’t been persuaded, even though he appreciates the “diversity of these opinions”. It may not surprise you to hear that none of the scholars put their name to the quotes in the story, but one told the paper: “George should be acknowledged. It’s obviously the right thing to do.”
Meanwhile, to other words in question — and a debate is raging about the decision to replace terms like “fat” and “ugly” in the books of British author Roald Dahl in the interest of inclusivity. The Age’s Kerrie O’Brien asks: “Is it a matter of keeping classics relevant or political correctness gone mad?” Even UK PM Rishi Sunak has weighed in via a spokesperson, “When it comes to our rich and varied literary heritage, the prime minister agrees with the BFG that we shouldn’t gobblefunk around with words,” The Guardian reports. Author Salman Rushdie, who has spent much of his life evading a fatwa for his inflammatory book, said Puffin Books and the Roald Dahl estate should be “ashamed”. But author Andy Griffiths was like, who cares? He says he’s changed words in his books. The fundamental stories are untouched, and our society is changing (hopefully) for the better, so why not tweak as needed? “Words matter. A lot. Any Snozzwanger, Quogwinkle or Human bean knows that,” he added.
ON A LIGHTER NOTE
An extraordinary 2000-year-old artefact was found more than 30 years ago in a ditch near the Roman empire’s north-west frontier in England’s north. It’s a 16-centimetre wooden tool, with a sort of knob capping off the end, and prim archaeologists of the day declared it is, quite clearly, a darning tool from the ancient Roman era. It was catalogued as such, and that was that. Until now. “I have to confess,” archaeology lecturer Rob Collins says, “part of me thinks it’s kind of self-evident that it is a penis.” Take a peek and decide for yourself. And why wouldn’t it be? The Roman world was filled with celebratory representations of a rather phallic nature — they showed up on mosaics, frescoes, pot decorations and were even popped onto a necklace and worn around the neck as some sort of masculine fashion statement, one assumes.
Researchers at the UK’s Newcastle University and University College Dublin revisited the catalogued item recently to learn more about its, erm, purpose. “We have had to cast our nets wide in thinking what would a six-and-a-half-inch wooden carving of a phallus be used for,” Collins said diplomatically. Look, it could be a dildo, they concluded, considering it is life size and that the phallus had “notably smoother ends”, as The Guardian put it (cut out that giggling, please). If so, this is the first Roman dildo we’ve ever discovered in archaeology, so that makes it the “most exciting” possibility. But it could be a pestle to a mortar that was used to make ancient pesto, or part of a statue that people touched for good luck. It’s definitely shrunk a little over the millennia, but researchers are stoked that the wood has stood the test of time. I’m heroically sidestepping that pun opportunity, folks.
Hoping something surprises and delights you today.
SAY WHAT?
What can be more dignified than Australians getting early access to super because they’re 26 weeks unemployed and they’ve got a family?
Stuart Robert
More accessible healthcare, a stronger welfare safety net, equitable education funding, subsidised energy bills, rent control etc — probably a lot of things could come before letting people raid their retirement nest egg, opposition assistant Treasury spokesman, which robs them of decades of compound interest.
CRIKEY RECAP
Twitter Australia has no staff left to deal with child sexual abuse material
“Elon Musk’s Twitter has no Australian staff who can respond to reports of child sexual abuse material, months after the tech company laid off the majority of its global workforce. On Monday morning, acting chief operating officer for the office of the eSafety commissioner Toby Dagg appeared in front of the parliamentary joint committee into how law enforcement is responding to child exploitation.
“Greens Senator David Shoebridge asked about Twitter’s handling of child sexual abuse material in light of NBC News reporting that found it was rife on the platform since Musk took over. Dagg told the committee the company did not have any local staff handling reports.”
Morrison swims in a swamp of US influence peddlers. But who does he speak for?
“Pompeo and Morrison have enjoyed a close personal relationship based on their shared religious beliefs — both are committed Pentecostal Christians. Their relationship appears to have blossomed when Morrison was prime minister from May 2019, and might have been kept secret had it not been for Morrison spilling the beans to The Australian‘s Paul Kelly, as part of a flattering portrait of Morrison’s evolving foreign policy expertise — particularly towards China.
“Morrison revealed to Kelly that while prime minister he was in regular contact with Pompeo. Crikey‘s inquiries indicate that none of this was officially recorded. There has been virtually no media attention either on the nature of the relationship or its impact on Australian foreign policy. Pompeo is a possible candidate for the next US presidential elections.”
When Fox News knew it was wrong, it kept on going
“’I did not believe it for one second,’ star talk show host Sean Hannity said in a deposition. ‘[Trump lawyer] Sidney Powell is lying,’ fellow television presenter Tucker Carlson is quoted as saying at the time. ‘Really crazy stuff!’ Rupert Murdoch texted Fox managers about a Rudy Giuliani press conference in November 2020 …
“But the evidence that the network’s management and stars knew the allegations were false even as they amplified them has shaken the US mainstream media. Brian Stelter, a former CNN presenter and author of Hoax, headlined his Atlantic piece with ‘I never truly understood Fox News until now’. In The Washington Post, Erik Wemple headlined his: ‘Fox News is worse than you thought’.”
READ ALL ABOUT IT
Panic as another strong quake hits Turkey-Syria border (SMH)
US ‘in no position to make demands’: China slams Blinken comments (Al Jazeera)
North Korea fires two more missiles into its Pacific ‘firing range’ (Reuters)
In pictures: aerial pictures of Esk Valley [New Zealand] reveal apocalyptic scene (Stuff)
Bangladesh shuts down main opposition newspaper (The Guardian)
As the pandemic swept America, deaths in prisons rose nearly 50% (The New York Times)
African Union says Israel’s observer status suspended (Al Jazeera)
Baftas 2023 highlights: from the Batmobile to a drunken Pinocchio (BBC)
THE COMMENTARIAT
Religious schools must be allowed to keep the right to discriminate — Kevin Donnelly (The Age) ($): “Often forgotten or ignored in debates about human rights is that there is no such thing as unlimited freedom to do whatever you want. Within a liberal, democratic society like Australia, each person’s rights are always balanced against the rights of others and the community in general. When it comes to employment, for example, there are times when the right to be employed has to be balanced against the right of employers to ensure their workers support and don’t undermine the organisation’s charter, mission and values. The Greens wouldn’t want to employ a climate sceptic who wanted more coalmines, just as a refugee activist group would not hire a staffer who was racist and xenophobic. Nor would a feminist collective employ a sexist male who disliked women.
“Any reasonable person would say ‘No way’ to these scenarios. It’s long been accepted there are times when it is OK to discriminate. One’s person’s freedom always has to be balanced against the beliefs and convictions of others. Women’s gyms are allowed to say no to men, and separate boys- and girls-only schools are allowed to exist. It’s only common sense to ask, then, why would someone with a strong commitment to a particular set of values want to apply for a job in an organisation or workplace that holds different values than theirs. The right to balance freedoms and sometimes discriminate is especially true for religious schools.”
View from The Hill: April 1 Aston byelection will be an all-female battle — Michelle Grattan (The Conversation): “Labor already has its female candidate in the field — Mary Doyle, who gave former Liberal member Alan Tudge a run for his money last year. Doyle, who works for an industry super fund, says she’s a ‘suburban mum’ who has ‘a mortgage on a three-bedroom weatherboard house’. Peter Dutton was quick to say the Liberals needed a woman, and he won’t be ignored in the way Scott Morrison was when he wanted a female for the 2018 Wentworth byelection (that was subsequently lost to an independent). The Victorian Liberal administrative committee is likely to choose the candidate — on the grounds there is not time for a rank-and-file preselection.
“The frontrunners are Melbourne City Councillor Roshena Campbell, a lawyer, and oncologist Ranjana Srivastava. Both have heavyweight referees: former treasurer Josh Frydenberg and former health minister Greg Hunt respectively. Also in the field are former state parliamentarian Cathrine Burnett–Wake and one male — deputy school principal Emanuele Cicchiello. The Liberals go into the contest as favourites, although both sides are painting themselves as underdogs. As Labor likes to point out, it is more than a century since a government won a federal byelection from an opposition. Apart from that, the seat is on a 2.8% margin, after a large swing, on a two-party basis, of more than 7% against the discredited Tudge in 2022. If the Liberals can’t hold Aston, they need to be very fearful indeed.”
HOLD THE FRONT PAGE
WHAT’S ON TODAY
Yuggera and Turrbal Country (also known as Brisbane)
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Brisbane Economic Development Agency’s Lisa Cavallaro, West Midlands Growth Company’s Jon Baty, and Liquid PR’s Hollie Jones will give a seminar about how Aussie businesses can expand into international markets, at Brisbane Business Hub.
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Author Elizabeth Coleman will speak about her new book, A Routine Infidelity, at Avid Reader bookshop.
