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Benzinga
Benzinga
Business
Adrian Volenik

Her Husband Hasn't Helped Financially For 20 Years And Has Been Cheating For 30. 'Is It Worth Divorcing Or Do I Just Wait Until He Dies?'

Mother-In-Law Interferes In Young Couple's Finances

After 46 years of marriage, Sarah from Vancouver called into “The Ramsey Show” with a question that left co-hosts John Delony and Rachel Cruze momentarily speechless.

“Is it worth divorcing at this point in time,” she asked, “or do I just wait until he dies because he’s not taking care of himself healthwise?”

A Marriage Built On Deception

Sarah explained that her husband hasn’t contributed financially to the household in over two decades. While he did pay off the mortgage years ago, she said, “I paid for everything else. But then once the mortgage was paid for, which has been more than 20 years ago, he’s quit paying for anything.”

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To make matters worse, she discovered he’s been cheating, possibly with the same woman, for 30 years. Sarah said she had suspicions over the years, especially given his shift work and secrecy with his phone, but he always denied it.

“I thought there was something going on a long time ago,” she said. “When I confronted him, he just said, ‘No, we’re friends.'” The truth finally hit when she came home from work one day over a year ago and found her husband and his longtime mistress in their backyard.

“Holy smokes,” Delony responded. “You’ve been divorced for 30 years. Y’all have just been living in the same house.”

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What Comes Next?

Sarah said she’s struggling with the idea of walking away from everything she’s invested, including potential access to her husband's pension. “I saw his will recently and it has not been changed,” she said. Still, she also suspects there may be a hidden bank account benefiting the other woman, though she has no proof.

Delony and Cruze didn't tell her what to do, but they told her she wasn't crazy for feeling betrayed or unsure.

“You’ve been cheated on financially. You’ve been cheated on romantically. Your whole marriage has been based in deception,” Delony told her.

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He also addressed the emotional toll: “One of the things that nobody ever talks about is that scary, terrifying realization that you don’t trust you either.”

As for a path forward, both hosts encouraged Sarah to surround herself with supportive people and seek professional help to plan her next steps–financially, legally and emotionally.

“When your spirit leaves,” Delony said, quoting personal finance expert Dave Ramsey, “let your body leave, too.”

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Image: Shutterstock

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