As a doctor, how often does a family member or friend ask: “I’ve got this little thing bothering me and wonder if you’d mind taking a look?” Sigma66
They used to, but the further away I’ve got from it, the less they trust me. I still had my prescription pad until about 10 years ago. It used to be that you could pay to be on the register, which I did, but it wasn’t very much. I used to just prescribe antibiotics for sore throats and stuff. Then they changed the rules, the spoilsports. One comedian – who I won’t name, but he’s better known than you might think – once tried to show me his genital warts at a urinal in the Edinburgh festival. I had no expertise in that area, so I refused to examine the appendage in question.
Did you ever encounter anyone who took umbrage to your treatment of them on TV Burp? Hectormandarin
I found myself in the company of Alan Sugar at the Baftas. He’s not famous for his sense of humour. He said: “My daughter tells me you do an impression of me.” I said: “Actually, it’s my ventriloquist dummy that does the impression, ‘You’re fired, you’re fired, and – with regret – you are fired,” or whatever it was I used to say on TV Burp. He just said: “Nah.” That was his assessment.
