In the poem Hours Ghazal, published in 2024, Hala Alyan writes: “The cost of wanting something is who you are on the other side of getting it.” The line is a glimpse into the mind of a woman, who, at 38, has paid a high price for desire and emerged intact after living through what might feel like several lifetimes for the rest of us.
Alyan is a Palestinian American poet, novelist, clinical psychologist and psychology professor at New York University. She is also the author of a memoir published this week titled I’ll Tell You When I’m Home.
To pre-empt a skeptical raised eyebrow over a memoir at 38, be assured: this is an unusual book. It is a story of the violence of exile over generations, a profound desire for motherhood, as well as surrogacy, addiction and the importance of remembering. The book is also a rumination on the nature of memoir and the often impossible attempts to reclaim and understand one’s past.
