it was the second Tuesday in November but Christmas was already in crisis. Sarah Gibbons had just received a shipment of baubles at her Glasgow homeware shop, Modern Love Store, and some crucial ornaments were missing. She hopped on a long-distance phone call to her suppliers in the US – she needed to sort this out. After all, her customers were clamouring for them. “People aren’t just buying one,” the 39-year-old shopkeeper told me after discovering the missing decorations, “they’re buying three or four at a time.” Three what? Turtle doves? Nutcrackers? Or perhaps some classic candy canes? Of course not. This year’s must-have bauble is in the shape of a lightly glittered syringe of Ozempic.
Growing up, my favourite Christmas ornament was a little pink plastic baby Jesus resting in a manger. He was bought by my great-aunt in Oberammergau, Germany, in 1990 – and although his battery hasn’t been changed since, you can still press his belly to hear Silent Night play. Today, decorations are a little different. Ozempic isn’t the only needle hanging from our needles: Britons can also purchase Christmas tree ornaments shaped like syringes of Botox and filler. Meanwhile, Selfridges is selling a dirty martini bauble, M&S is peddling a hanging prawn cocktail and Aldi is offering an ornament shaped like an air fryer. Move over, baby Jesus; glass has now been blown into the likeness of Harry Styles, Taylor Swift and The Bear’s Jeremy Allen White.
