Gemma Collins has been brutally honest about her hopes of becoming a mother in her Channel 4 documentary about self-harm.
The 41-year-old reality TV star decided to make the hour-long film to try and get to the bottom of why people self-harm and how it can affect their loved ones.
As well as her close family and friends, Gemma's fiancé Rami Hawash also appears in it several times and recalls when he once walked in on Gemma after she had cut herself.
During their emotional conversation, Gemma admitted: "In the back of my mind, because obviously we do want to go on to have a baby and stuff and I feel very happy with you and very settled with you, and I think always in the back of my mind you think, 'Oh sh*t is it gonna come back?'"
However, after speaking to various people including her own therapist, Gemma is relieved to find out that having a baby isn't necessarily going to stir up those old feelings.
"I've definitely made peace with it all and that's why I'm ready for the next chapter," she said at the end of the documentary.
"I want my children, I want the cat, I want the dog, I want my child. I will hopefully be the best mum on earth, but everyone says that don't they?
"It's gonna be hard. Mum's gonna want to put it in tap dancing school as soon as it's born and I'm gonna be like, 'chill the fu*k down mother'," Gemma joked.
Her comment referred to the fact that her mother Joan encourage her to sing, dance and perform as a child.
"I remember being really unhappy at school, I always felt like I was misunderstood. I couldn't stand it because the teachers, I don't think they were used to my sort of personality," Gemma said of her childhood.
"My mum grew up without any confidence and she always said, 'I never want you to be like that'," Gemma continued.
"I was never allowed to be shy, it was always 'get up and perform Gemma, sing Madonna Gemma'. It was a bit much but if that's what makes her happy you know, but I weren't always in the mood."
Talking about suppressing her emotions, Gemma added: "Obviously me never really being able to let out my feelings and then building up and erupting, so I started cutting myself as a release."
Gemma began self-harming as a teenager but said she hasn't done it now since her early thirties.
For support on dealing with self-harm see mind.org.uk/selfharm or call Mind's confidential Infoline on 0300 123 3393.
For further help or advice, please visit: https://www.channel4.com/4viewers/help-support
Gemma Collins: Self-Harm and Me is available to watch on All 4.
