Thursday 23 November
8am The grandchildren of the hosting family “partially” adopted a cat. He is a big cat that was clearly a pet. I could tell he was raised in a home with land; he has all the features of a pet cat, but he can manage being outside as well. The only challenge is that their mother is terrified of cats, an additional reason we never let ours outside the room we are in.
The cat is allowed to stay at the stairs, they gave him a fluffy mat and offer him food. Most of the time he stays at the entrance of the home, and sometimes, mainly in the morning when their mother is in the kitchen, they sneak him inside to play with him. It saddens me that he doesn’t have better living conditions, but taking into consideration the situation we are going through, this is very good.
The kids come into our room to ask for food for their cat. We have a quick chat. The oldest girl says her mother “has no job”. I try my best to explain the concept of “unpaid labour” and that what their mother is doing is as important, or even more important, as what their father does outside the home. We talk for 10 minutes and then I realise that we might not even live to see another day. So I decide to end the lecture.
On their way out, I feel a little guilty for closing this opportunity to spread awareness, so I quickly tell them, while one of them is holding the doorknob, the other holding the food can and the third looking outside: “And by the way, women can achieve anything they want, they can be the managers and leaders of the biggest associations; or, if they choose to, they can be housewives.
“Men can cry, wear pink, express their feelings and they can grow their hair long, and they can be stay-at-home dads if they want to. It is OK for a woman to be a mechanic and a man to be a beautician.”
They gave me a look that says: “Can we leave now? We have a cat to feed.” I let them go.
In fact, our hosts are gender pioneers. Ahmad has a sister who is studying abroad. In the neighbourhood they are living in, no girl has ever travelled abroad by herself to study. When she was about to travel, uncles came to their house and yelled at her father for the “horrible thing you are about to let your daughter do”, and said they would never talk to him again. Even neighbours shared their disapproval of such a move happening.
However, the grandmother discussed it with her three sons. They all agreed to support their sister. They went to their father and told him they were willing to face the stigma from the community. The sister travelled to study, and since then, she has been an inspiration. Later, two other families sent their daughters to study abroad, and now they consider the sister as a focal point for female students there. After one year, the family repaired the relationship with the uncles.
***
11am I am arguing with a street seller over the price of plastic bags. These bags have been added to the list of luxury items, when you go to buy anything, the sellers give you the product without a bag because either they don’t have any or because of their high price.
I meet a guy I know. He tells me that nothing matters or scares him; the only thing he is concerned about is his wife. He tells me: “My wife is eight-months pregnant, and her pregnancy has been difficult since the beginning. I am terrified of the options: I hope this whole situation ends before she gives birth.”
I tell him that hopefully this will end soon, even though I am not sure at all. He remains silent while I wave away flies over my head and double check, for the 1,000th time, my phone and my wallet, to make sure they are safe. Losing them would be a nightmare.
Then he tells me: “I read that women in Gaza are giving birth through C-section without anaesthesia. This is one of the scariest things a woman could go through. If this happens to my wife, I don’t know what I will do.”
I try to calm him and we talk for a while. On my way again, I remember a friend who once shared with me how difficult a C-section is when I casually asked: “Why don’t all women have C-sections since they will have anaesthesia and not feel the pain of natural childbirth?”
She explained that in a C-section, they cut seven layers of the skin to reach the baby. She shared with me the pain after the surgery, saying: “The first cough a woman has after a C-section is deadly. The pain is horrible.”
I really hope his wife gives birth with complete medical care.
***
4pm Ahmad shared with me an incident that happened in front of him in the market that shook me to the core. A man was selling some blankets in the street. It goes without saying that the price he was asking for was much higher than normal. Another man came to him and asked him for the price, and then he buys all of them.
The other man took them to another spot nearby and began selling the blankets for 25% more.
The misery of prices continues. If you bought an item yesterday, you cannot simply assume the price is the same the next day. One common phrase is: “How much is it today?”
I am terrified of where we are heading.
***
7pm The ceasefire.
All people have been talking about is the ceasefire that will happen tomorrow. My friends who have a better access to internet keep sending me updates. Everyone is anxious that anything might happen within the hours left before it goes through, which will hinder the whole thing.
Waiting and praying for a ceasefire to happen, people are still sad and exhausted.
People are still displaced; homes and complete areas ruined; many lost their loved ones; dreams were aborted; and the situation is miserable.
A guy told me a couple of days ago that he was tired of the daily survival attempts Gazans are going through. How every minute of the day is another struggle: for safety, for water, for internet, for clothes, for blankets – and to keep sane.
I hope, I really hope, a ceasefire will be the first step towards the end of this nightmare.
Ziad filed his diary before it was announced yesterday that Israel and Hamas would start a four-day truce on Friday morning.
