Just over three weeks ago, I woke up to the news that a civil war had broken out in Sudan.
My family, including my dad Elmugiera, were still over there after visiting for a family wedding. I was horrified at the thought of another coup that would end with thousands of innocent lives being collateral damage.
It was frustrating and infuriating.
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The last few weeks have been arguably the most stressful of my life. Waking up every day with an uneasy feeling about the fate of your family and the people of your country grew exhausting.
The current death toll of civilians is now over 600. However, the real number is thought to be much higher.
The conflict is between General Abdel Fattah al-Burhan, leader of the Sudanese Army, and General Mohamed Hamdan Dagalo, leader of the Rapid Support Forces, a paramilitary organization (RSF).
Both groups were in an allied partnership. Yet the dispute started when the RSF accused the Sudanese Army of illegal militarization, leading to friction between the two.
For a coup to happen three times in Sudan in the last five years shows how both leaders have no regard for civilian life and prioritise power.
My anger at both the Sudanese Army and the Rapid Support Forces grows for every single person that perishes. Their blood is on Burhan's and Hamdan's hands.
For over two weeks, my family has been making plans on how to leave the warzone - a perilous journey that would present many risks.
There were a few options. Some destinations such as Egypt, Ethiopia and Port Sudan would be safer than others.
These were the most viable options for my dad as he could then be evacuated. However, he needed to take into consideration the length of the trip and whether he knew anyone in the said destinations.
The journey to Egypt from Sudan would take over 24 hours while going to Ethiopia would take around just under 20.
Speaking of his thoughts on how to escape, my dad told me: “The borders in Egypt are too messy and unreliable. Not to mention the journey costs much more than to Port Sudan.
“We have family in Port Sudan and I haven’t had the chance to visit yet so I want to see them before I leave.”
Port Sudan, a city bordering on the Red Sea in Sudan, has been a refuge for many fleeing the conflict in Khartoum and Omdurman.
The journey itself would take around half a day by car, give or take an hour or two. It did not sit right with me.
I felt so much uneasiness knowing that it would probably be one of the most dangerous journeys that my family would have to undertake.
The risk of them coming across an RSF member or soldier and their disregard for human life terrified me to my core even though I believed they would be okay.
On the afternoon of May 1, I received a call from my dad saying: “We have arrived safely habibi, and just on the way to see the family, it’s much more peaceful here.”
There it was. A feeling I hadn’t felt in a long time, a feeling I was chasing for the last few weeks and that I deeply needed. It was a relief.
My dad explained the car journey as ‘surprising and uncomfortable’. He had explained how he saw different families with the same ideas.
“We saw a few people with the same idea. There was even a family walking with suitcases at one point, I think to maybe try and see if someone would stop, it feels like a movie.”
My family had made it out and it was one of the best feelings in my life however, it had just put everything into perspective.
There are moments in my life where my biggest problem is a situation that is so little, it won’t be remembered the next day.
There are people around the world whose biggest problem is knowing if their friends and families are alive or dead.
When you are put in those shoes, it makes you realise in retrospect, how small the situations we deal with in our daily lives in comparison to the people of Sudan, Ukraine, and other countries in conflict.
A petition asking for peace in Sudan has received over 28,000 signatures at the time of publication of this article.
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