The thrills and spills of the Frenkie de Jong sagaTM have kept us invigorated all summer, and today is no different. Word comes from Spain that the player would only leave Barcelona for Chelsea, who aren’t prepared to pay him as much danger money as Manchester United, and that he has advised teammates of his intention to remain at the Camp Nou and swerve Old Trafford. Shortly afterwards, Joan Laporta was seen crying softly at his desk, while Xavi finalised plans for the next friendly – in which he plans to try De Jong at ballboy.
In other “més que un cult” news, Barça won’t be able to re-sign Lionel Messi – but not because they’re mortgaging their future to stay alive in the present, spending money with which they should pay current players on buying new ones. Rather, Messi has a contract with Paris Saint-Germain – presumably not unlike the ones Robert Lewandowski had with Bayern Munich and Raphinha with Leeds. “We will see in the future. It’s not the time to talk about him,” said Xavi, talking about him anyway.
