October 1958, and the new Tottenham manager, Bill Nicholson, applauds his team off the pitch after they belt Everton 10-4 in his very first game in charge. “It can only get worse,” deadpans Danny Blanchflower. Spurs of course go on to win the double not that long after. Now they’re planning to do another spectacular number on the Toffees, by running off with Richarlison and Anthony Gordon. Antonio Conte to follow in Bill Nic’s title-winning footsteps? You wouldn’t put anything past him.
Tottenham are also interested in the Barcelona defender Clément Lenglet. Spurs have never beaten Barça, never mind by six goals.
Manchester United’s desire to transform themselves into Ajax-upon-Irwell shows no sign of letting up. They’re close to sealing a deal for Frenkie de Jong, are still hoping Christian Eriksen will say yes, have their beady eye on Matthijs de Ligt, maintain an interest in Lisandro Martínez, and are prepping a £70m bid for Antony.
They’ve yet to clock Chelsea’s desire to get rid of Erik ten Hag alumnus Hakim Ziyech. As a result, Milan are leading the race for the Moroccan. Arsenal meanwhile are also interested in the aforementioned Martínez. Poor Ajax can’t catch a break.
And Chelsea wish to replace Ziyech with Raheem Sterling, who may be bundled in a package with Nathan Aké. They also fancy Jude Bellingham, as do Liverpool, but Real Madrid have suddenly shown an interest, so that will probably be that.