“I think we’ll take a trip like that when we retire,” a boomer relative said to me. My brain couldn’t send the signal quickly enough to restrain myself from a judgmental grimace and shaking of the head.
“Why wait?” I asked, trying to reshape my face back into a neutral position, but my polite, rational self had lost the battle.
Life is seasonal and sometimes the magical Venn diagram of ample time, financial resources and good health don’t overlap. But it’s important that we give ourselves permission to do things that may seem less than optimal financially — especially for long-term goals — to take advantage of where we are in life right now.
At 33, this past year has been filled with living life indulgently — Broadway shows, international travel, weekend getaways and dinners out — thanks to a realization that I have a potentially brief window of opportunity to exercise wants and whims. I’m child-free, in good health and my husband and I paid off his student loans in 2020.
After living below our means for the past decade, we have no debt and have been saving aggressively along with investing to set us up for the future. But in the last year, I modified some of my saving and investing goals to free up financial resources to take advantage of this phase of my life. I didn’t want to look back wistfully in a few years and think, “Wow, we really should’ve maximized being child-free, debt-free and young and healthy when we had the chance.”
As a deeply practical person who often focuses more on preparing for the future than living in the present, this life shift didn’t come naturally. My brain is hardwired to think like my relative who has put off taking a dream vacation for decades. I fixate on making long-term goals and shoring up financial resources to ensure a stable life for my future self. These aren’t negative attributes, but much of this behavior ultimately led to severe burnout and a case of self-diagnosed depression. And that was before a global pandemic hit.
The concept of taking advantage of life’s phases isn't entirely about pampering yourself. Rather, it’s about recognizing the moments that could be taken from you within a few years and putting your resources of time and money toward maximizing fleeting opportunities.
One of the simplest ways to start preparing is by utilizing a “what if” savings account. Yes, it’s gimmicky, but it encourages you to set aside modest amounts of money in the case of a “what if.” In our household, what if the Buffalo Bills finally make it to the Super Bowl and my husband wants to be able to fly to his hometown to watch the game with his dad? We have a savings account that’s earmarked for just that possibility.
In my current phase of living my 33rd year of life indulgently, we simply reconfigured our budget. We reallocated from longer-term savings and investing goals to have more money to put toward buying tickets to see live shows and international travel. Of course, we still try to do things economically by using discount ticket options and points and miles to subsidize travel expenses. Being indulgent doesn’t necessarily mean overspending.
Perhaps your season is having children who are at the tender age of being old enough to engage with you in a new, meaningful way but young enough to still want to hang out with their parents. Or taking the time to go on adventures with older children who are often more absorbed in their phones or gaming devices and less interested in creating core memories.
It could be recognizing the aging process in your parents and taking advantage of opportunities to relive favorite pastimes while they’re still able-bodied. Maybe it’s just being sure to spend quality time together, especially if there is any concern about potential mental decline in the future. Or, perhaps, you’re like me, and see a window of frivolity that you cherish, but know will close quickly.
None of this is to say you can’t live a robust life in all seasons, but everything comes with trade-offs. Having young children and aging parents who don’t live near you might mean your financial goals and limited free time are focused on being with loved ones instead of other pastimes in which you previously indulged.
This approach doesn’t mean just saying yes all the time. Constant acceptance of every opportunity or indulging every desire is expensive and likely to result in debt of some kind. “No” can be just as powerful of a word when you’re looking to maximize a season of your life. You have to balance what’s most important for the present with the groundwork you’re laying for your future self.
And remember, you’re allowed to recalibrate. You’re allowed to change your mind. You’re allowed to enjoy your life before retirement is fully funded or your student loans are entirely paid off. Sometimes, embracing a stage of life doesn’t require spending money, but may require stepping back from other demands on your time. Perhaps the most critical piece of all is allowing yourself the freedom to grow, change and reevaluate what’s important.
