By now you will be aware of the petition demanding another general election. Finally, an answer to what would happen if Maga had sex with the People’s Vote. I assume we don’t use the phrase “bastard offspring” any longer, but in this case I’ll be making an exception. To see the obnoxious essence of not one but two excruciating political movements hook up and push out a screaming signature-baby is not a pretty sight. I have immediately launched a petition to forcibly sterilise all political movements.
To recap, this is the petition started by a Shropshire publican after he’d Googled “how to change the prime minister” and it told him to start a petition. Not a great ad for Google’s search accuracy, let’s face it, but I guess we already knew that was ageing like an unsealed bag-in-box of Phillip Schofield wine. Anyway, the resultant petition has now garnered two and a half million digital signatures, probably many more by the time you read this, and been pushed by public figures ranging from Elon Musk to Michael Caine. Fine. The Jaws film where the shark genuinely follows the Brody family all the way to the Bahamas is no longer the stupidest thing Michael’s done.
