An Edinburgh student whose mother took her own life “completely out of the blue” has told of the “heartbreaking trauma” of finding a note containing her ‘darkest thoughts’.
Rachael Turner described mum Gail as “pure sunshine” with no history of mental health issues before her tragic passing in July 2015.
The Edinburgh Napier marketing student was just 16 when she experienced the torture of discovering mum the food and technology teacher’s body in the family garden.
It sent shockwaves through their local community in the Highlands, but Rachael, alongside brother Ross and dad George would later find a diary on her doting mum’s laptop describing the stresses of her job among a number of other struggles.
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Now 22, Rachael has opened up about the family trauma in a bid to convince other young Scots in similar situations ‘there is hope’ as she encouraged those going through difficult times to share their experiences with family and friends.
She told the Daily Record: "A high school teacher with two children committed suicide - stuff like that didn't happen in the Highlands.
"My mum was pure sunshine. She was so bubbly, you found her loud laugh funnier than the joke itself. She had no history of mental health issues whatsoever.
"She was a dedicated Health and Food Technology teacher at my high school. My mum cared deeply for students who struggled academically.
"We did not see this coming, that's what we struggled with the most; there was no way of helping her, we had no idea what was going on."
Rachael had returned from a month-long volunteering trip to Tanzania in the weeks leading up to her mum's passing.
Elated Gail and George, now 67, had recently waved Ross, 27, off to university.
Two days later, Rachel and George found Gail's body and were left utterly devastated.
"We desperately looked for answers," Rachael added.
"The day mum died, I turned her room upside down looking for a note.
"A few days later, we found a document that was well-hidden on her laptop.
"On it she wrote about suicidal thoughts, the stresses of her job and her emotions.
"It was all so traumatic and shocking."
News of Gail's tragic passed spread like wildfire, thrusting schoolgirl Rachael into a dark place she'd never previously known.
"Ross and I were almost labelled as the kids whose mum killed herself, it was really hard.
"I was 16; I had a boyfriend, friend drama, exams, puberty, it was already a difficult time. I'm so close to my dad but I needed my mum."
Despite enduring such an ordeal, brave Rachael is now in her final year at the Capital institution and hopes to pursue a marketing career abroad.
Her dissertation, due in April, is dedicated to Gail.
"Over the years we have accepted that my mum wasn't well," Rachael said.
"Mum's death has shaped me. I have perspective and know life it too short to sweat the small stuff and have silly arguments.
"I have the most incredible friends and value good relationships."
To other young Scots faced with similar heartache, Rachael assures 'you will get through this'.
"Going to therapy and distracting yourself can help, but I would always urge someone grieving to allow themselves to feel their emotions," she added.
"Don't put pressure on yourself, that can lead to burnout.
"When my mum died I felt like nobody could relate or understand.
"I will always be happy to speak about mum, to help others going through the same thing
"There is always hope."
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Parental Mental Health Day (PMHD) falls on January 27 this year and was introduced by stem4 (supporting teenage mental health).
The UK charity promotes positive mental health in teenagers and those who support them through mental health education, resilience strategies and early intervention.
A statement on their website read: "The past year has been like no other, with huge impact on young people’s mental health.
"PMHD encourages understanding and awareness of the importance of parents’ mental health and its impact on the whole family system.
"With this year’s theme being ‘balance’, the day aims to get parents and carers to take a moment to reflect on the balance they have in their lives and to take positive steps to make change.
