Perhaps the fact that it’s Book Week – again – comes as no surprise to you. Perhaps you have already hand-crafted a whole-head Gruffalo mask from papier-mache and are just mixing the perfect purple for the custom-made prickles down the back of the body suit which you have designed and sewn for your child? Perhaps you are in the testing-for-breathability-stage of constructing the Cheshire cat costume you pulled together a week ago? Well done to you – and bonus points for the classics.
But perhaps, instead, you have just received a mildly expletive-laden WhatsApp group-chat message reminding you and all the other parents that Book Week is, once more, nigh.
Did you have plans to make Grandma Poss’ apron and recreate all the foods that finally make Hush seen? I’m sure you did. We all did. But, here we are, a few days out from Book Week – and no apron.
Parent, it is OK.
We are here to help. Assembled from the epiphanies and scars of Guardian Australia staff, here are six handy tips for parents who definitely remembered that Book Week is a thing but forgot that it’s a thing happening in a couple of days.
Firstly, some parameters. Anything that begins as a TV or movie is out. We might be late to the costume party but we still have standards. Like any other proprietor of young girls, I have 3.4 Elsa costumes shoved in a cupboard ready and willing to make an outing. But we’re all better than that, right? Yes there are books about Frozen and Moana and Bluey and there are very cheap, flammable costumes readily available from your friendly department store, but let’s aim for the low-lying stars. We can do it! I believe in you.
1. Real people are in books, too
So, you’ve got no cardboard, no spare sheets, no PVA glue. No matter! Children’s books are awash with inspirational biographies and autobiographies of people who wear normal clothes and minimal accessories. Hello, Little People, Big Dreams phenomenon. Hi there, Goodnight Stories for Rebel Girls!
Got some binoculars and something khaki? Poof! Your kid is David Attenborough or Jane Goodall!
Got something white, a tennis racket and aluminium foil? Hooray! Your child is now Evonne Goolagong Cawley or Serena Williams (foil around a paper – or plastic – plate will do very well for a Wimbledon trophy … for the ladies).
Have a soccer ball? Nice one. Sam Kerr has a whole series about herself in which she is a child wearing children’s clothes, but often in proximity to a soccer ball. As do Tim Cahill and Lydia Williams. Done. You are done. Good one, parent. You are a tops parent.
2. Do you have a box?
My mother was a bit of a Book Week or Multicultural Week pro. I’d be Pippi Longstocking, the Mad Hatter, Cleopatra. She was that mum.
And then, one year, there was a glitch in the system. I found myself on book parade in a cardboard box, with some doors drawn in black marker on it. For I was a wardrobe – from The Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe.
This was fine.
For the more avant garde parent with access to white paint, you can get your child in a box to declare they are in fact a child in a ball, à la the popular This is a ball.
In fact, there are a lot of rectangular prisms and cubes in children’s books. Roll with it.
3. Consider the expectation-busting princess
No ohmygoditsbookweek article would be complete without due consideration given to The Paperbag Princess. For four decades this book has been saving the faces of parents who forgot it was parade day. Consider this – not only does the costume consist only of a large paper bag (or brown paper – you could probably get away with baking paper), but you do not even need to get your child to brush their hair or put on their shoes.
More advanced in this category: the Princess in Black series. She just wears black. You’ll need an eye mask and a bit of black fabric or paper as a cape. That’s it. Way to comply with Book Week demands and partially challenge feminine archetypes, parent!
4. Put something on your child’s head
Sometimes, you just need a few little bits and pieces - et voilà! Your child has a new head and is ready for Book Week.
Take the popular Diary of a Wimpy Kid series. The good people at Penguin have pre-empted your dilemma and have downloadable print outs for masks for the faces of the main characters.
For Minecraft fans (yes it’s a video game, but it is such a popular book series I think we can include this within our strict rules), you can also print out templates for different characters heads, colour them in and then glue them to a box that the child can wear on their head. For advanced parents, you might consider zip-tying the box to a bike helmet for security.
In both cases, normal children’s clothes will suffice for the rest of the body.
5. Eyeliner will save you
Do you have face paint in the house? Wonderful! Perhaps you can deck your child out entirely in grey, paint their face grey and – huzzah! – they are Gilbert the Great (it’s a shark).
But perhaps you’re out of face paint and it’s book parade morning. Makeup is also fine. A bit of judicious eyeliner will make a very good nose and whiskers – the foundation for so many storybook animals.
Is that Fantastic Mr Fox there with ears made from Weetbix cardboard and a pillowcase hastily labelled ‘Rabbits and Chickens’? Why yes. Could that be Laura from Little House on the Prairie with her freckles and gingham dress? Indeed, it is the one and same. Do I spy Vincent Van Bear with the straw hat and paint palette? Yes, I do.
6. A witch’s hat is all things
When in doubt, wear a witch’s hat. Maybe your child is Harry Potter, Hermione, some Grimm villain. It doesn’t matter. When you wear a witch’s hat, you are dressed up. You are finished. Your job is done.
And … you are prepared for Halloween.
Got a last-minute, no-fuss, no-shame Book Week costume suggestion? Share in the comments below
