Donald Trump assumes office with promise to be the very bestest best

This was the moment the US had been awaiting for nearly 250 years. So modest. Photograph: Angelina Katsanis/AP

They came in dribs and drabs, the unwanted, the uninvited and the unloved. First to arrive in Washington was Liz Truss, wearing a red Maga hat and a bright blue coat looking like an extra in a Paddington Bear film.

Lizzie could be found standing on a street corner in downtown DC, screaming: “I used to be prime minister of the United Kingdom.”