DEAR ABBY: I’ve been married for 34 years. During most of them, I was unfaithful. I never felt like I was truly married because my husband never gave me the time of day, but I liked my marital status because, I guess, we were companions. As soon as my kids married and the nest was empty, I left. I didn’t feel I needed to stay and be unhappy, so I moved out. Why I didn’t divorce him during those eight years is beyond me.
We are now back together, and I don’t know why. We’re not physically attracted to each other, and he is manipulative, selfish and sarcastic. Why, Abby, am I afraid to move on from this? I hate it when we’re alone at home. I’d rather spend the day with my grandchildren. I didn’t miss him at all when I was away, but he called me often and I felt obligated and guilty. What should I do? — SEARCHING FOR HAPPY IN ARIZONA
