Among the finance challenges many people face are those involving personal relationships.
And personal finance coach Dave Ramsey suggests that there are particularly important decisions to be made around spending money for married couples.
Related: The average American confronts new 401(k), retirement savings facts
In a recent email sent by Ramsey Solutions to TheStreet, one woman explained to Ramsey her specific concerns about a financial proposal her husband had made.
"Dear Dave," she wrote, identifying herself as Val. "My husband and I both work outside the home, and he has come up with an idea for our fun money. He wants us to set up an account where we both put 5% of our earnings for discretionary spending."
"The issue in my mind is that he would have a lot more to spend, because he makes much more money than I do," she continued. "He says he feels he should be able to spend more since he makes more. I'm not a greedy person, and I don't spend money on a lot of frivolous things, but I do think things would be even. I feel we should each put in the same dollar amount — one that's fair to both of us — if we're going to do this. What do you think?"
Dave Ramsey bluntly responds
The Ramsey Show host summarized his thoughts on the subject in a few quick words.
"This isn't a good plan," Ramsey wrote. "I'm sure your husband means well, and that he's really a good guy overall, but it sounds to me like he probably hasn't thought this whole thing through. As they stand now, the details of his idea play out as pretty immature and selfish. And something tells me you wouldn't marry a man like that."
Ramsey offered an idea about one other approach to thinking through the proposal.
More on Dave Ramsey
- Ramsey explains one major key to early retirement
- Dave Ramsey discusses one big money mistake to avoid
- Ramsey shares important advice on mortgages
"Think about it this way," he suggested. "There are plenty of families out there where only one person works outside the home and generates an actual income. Would it be fair to say that whoever brings home the paycheck is the only one who can have fun spending once in a while? Of course not!"
"In most cases, spouses who don't work outside the home take on tons of responsibility and accomplish several things every single day — especially if the couple has kids," Ramsey added. "If you put a monetary amount on all that, it'd wind up being a pretty nice income dollars-wise."
TheStreet
Dave Ramsey offers a reminder
Ramsey then offered some advice on how to think of money challenges in a marriage as a life-long partnership.
"Remember back when you two got married?" he asked. "If it were anything close to a traditional ceremony, I'll bet the preacher pronounced you two 'as one.' As in every thing and every way."
Related: The average American faces one major 401(k) retirement dilemma
Ramsey explained a bit further his view on that part of a relationship.
"That means you have one income, a combined income, and it's our income," he wrote. "If you own a home, it's our home. It's not more his home just because he makes more money than you. Our kids, our marriage our everything. Get the picture?"
"Marriage is not a me proposition," Ramsey continued. "It should always be a we thing."
"Your husband needs to be reminded of that."
Related: Veteran fund manager picks favorite stocks for 2024
