When it comes to personal finances, most people have a circle of friends and family who experience different degrees of success.
Bestselling author and radio host Dave Ramsey has some important advice on talking with them about these issues.
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In a number of instances, the matter of having practical and realistic expectations is key.
One person seeking advice recently asked Ramsey about a friend of his who was encountering financial difficulties along these lines.
"Dear Dave," wrote a man identifying himself as Garrett, according to an email forwarded to TheStreet by Ramsey Solutions. "My best friend is having financial problems, and I'm worried about him. He's 'between jobs' now and making less than $600 a month through a part-time job.
"He says he’s holding out for his dream job, which is about ten hours away, but even when he’s working full time, he always asks to borrow money or says he's running low," he continued. "He interviewed for his dream job several months ago, and I haven't got the heart to tell him he was probably passed over for the position. Is there anything I can do to help him?"
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Ramsey offers some words of advice
The personal finance expert mentioned their friendship and how that fact alone can help when making an effort to communicate about his troubles.
"I assume that since you're good friends, he's willing to listen to what you have to say," Ramsey wrote. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with having a dream job. You just have to be practical and realistic at the same time."
Ramsey took a deeper dive into his view on what he's heard in this context about Garrett's friend.
"This next part is more observation than insult, so I hope you'll understand," Ramsey wrote. "Your friend sounds to me like he might be a little impulsive and unrealistic. When it comes right down to it, maybe a touch immature, too."
"So, I think what we're talking about here is how to give your friend a gentle, well-intentioned nudge in a more realistic direction," he added. "He needs to open his eyes to some positive financial realities of life — like living on a written, monthly budget—and not making a habit of chasing rainbows and making excuses."
Ramsey advises a major change to make
The radio host offered a few ideas on what he would say if he was talking to the friend.
"If he came to me for advice, the first thing I'd tell him is that the most employable people are ones who aren't broke," he wrote. "When you go into a job interview and you're broke, it's easy to come off as desperate and tense. That doesn't make for a very good interview."
Ramsey explained his thinking on one way to improve that impression.
The answer to that, when you're essentially unemployed, is to work any legitimate full-time job. At the very least, two, three or even four part-time jobs. Deliver pizzas, wait tables and mow yards. It doesn't matter what you're doing, as long as you're generating a livable income for yourself. Smile and be professional at whatever you're doing, too. You never know when you might come face-to-face with your next real employer. But none of this will happen if you're working three or four hours a day, and spending most of your time at home in front of the television.
I hope this helps. I hope your friend will listen to you and understand you have his best interests at heart. But if he doesn't, all you can do is hope for the best and pray for him.
Best of luck, Garrett. You're a good friend.
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