A final video left by London gangster turned actor Dave Courtney before he died revealed that the 64-year-old was "hurting and in a lot of pain".
The video, released on Courtney's social media accounts on Tuesday, was filmed on July 5 in his Camelot Castle home in Plumstead, more than three months before he shot himself.
"The video clearly shows Dave had not taken the decision to take his own life lightly, and had gone into thorough planning and preparation to ensure as little pain as possible for his loved ones in the aftermath of his death," a statement said.
Courtney was seen smiling at the camera with a wall of firearms behind him in his home.
He said: "As you can all see I am in sound mind and body. Sorry I've took the coward's way out.
"I am hurting. I am disguising a lot of pain," he explained.
He described how he couldn't get up and down stairs and into a car due to illnesses.
"I'm not enjoying it at the moment. That's really it. I don't want to go and waste a wicked life I've had, absolutely suburb.
"And then the rest of it in pain, trying not to go and end it because it would upset everybody else. I'm not enjoying it, and I do what I want.
The full video can be viewed across our other platforms. pic.twitter.com/G6a76TVqVP
— Dave Courtney OBE Official (@davecourtney666) October 24, 2023
"That is really why I'm not here today. Please don't be sad."
The video was found following an examination of Courtney's personal effects by Brendan McGirr, the statement said.
The East End gangster, nicknamed the "most feared man in Britain", was found dead at his home in Chestnut Rise on Sunday.
Courtney, who claimed to be an associate of 1960s gangland criminals the Kray twins, swapped an earlier life of crime for writing books in his later years.
He starred in gangster films The Dead Sleep Easy and Clubbing To Death, but struggled with cancer and arthritis in his later years.
The 64-year-old "tragically took his own life in the early hours of Sunday with a firearm”, according to a statement posted to his social media accounts.
The reformed criminal’s body was reportedly found by his friend and lodger.
A friend quoted by The Sun told how they had all “stayed up until 4am drinking” before they went to bed.
The source reportedly said the lodger made the grim discovery after he went to check on Courtney at around 11am, because his bedroom was “very quiet”.
His death came just hours after Courtney had spent the day watching his beloved Charlton beat Reading 4-0 with his friends.
A tribute on behalf of Courtney’s family has been posted on X, formally Twitter.
His loved ones wrote: “He had lived an incredible, colourful rock’n roll life in which he touched the hearts of so many.
“The physical pain of living the lifestyle he chose, especially due to the pain of both cancer and arthritis in his later years, became too much.”
The death is currently being treated as unexpected and is under investigation by the Metropolitan Police. No arrests have been made.
If you're struggling and need to talk, the Samaritans operate a free helpline open 24/7 on 116 123. Alternatively, you can email jo@samaritans.org or visit their site to find your local branch.
