Homeland actor Damian Lewis said he was drained and exhausted for "four or five months" after the death of his wife Helen McCrory last year.
Acclaimed theatre and screen actress Helen, who was known for playing powerful women such as Shelby family matriarch Aunt Polly in the BBC gang drama Peaky Blinders and Narcissa Malfoy in the Harry Potter films, died in April 2021 aged 52 following a battle with cancer.
Damian, 51, described losing his wife of more than a decade, with whom he shares two children, as both a 'creative' and 'difficult and sad' time in his life.
Damian described living with cancer and supporting a loved one as 'physically draining' and 'semi-grieving', as Helen fought her cancer for four-and-a-half years.
"They say that the first day of diagnosis of an illness that could be terminal is your first day of grief. You are in a state of semi-grief while the person is still alive because there is always the sense that something might go wrong at any point," he told The Times magazine.
"There’s a hyper-alertness and you are incredibly present and charged at all times. You’re on a sort of war footing. You’ve got something to deal with that gives you great focus. Everything is going into getting that person better."
He added: "Until the moment of death you’re fully engaged in living the best possible life that can be lived for the person dying, and for you as a family and for the children. It takes an enormous amount of energy. So the collapse in death, the exhaustion, comes with that."
Helen tragically died in April 2021.
An incredible outpouring of support and memories from former colleagues and fans around the world ensued. Rather than be sad and depressed, Damian shared that he found 'a new energy' in his grief.
He explained that 'however deep and profound your sadness, a new beginning always has an energy to it.'
The actor said he has accepted life has changed but it allows him for a new beginning, and next chapter.
Following Helen's death, Damian took a step back from working and acting altogether. The actor is best known for his roles as Army Major Richard Winters in the HBO mini-series Band Of Brothers, Nicholas Brody in the Showtime series Homeland and Henry VIII in Wolf Hall.
However, now he's ready to return to the acting world and has taken a role as Nicholas Elliott in A Spy Among Friends, created by Homeland’s Alex Carey.
The seven-part series follows the defection of notorious British intelligence officer and KGB double agent, Kim Philby, played by Mare of Easttown's Pearce, through the lens of his complex relationship with MI6 colleague and close friend, Nicholas Elliott (Lewis).
It isn't just acting Lewis has embraced though. He has also been branching out into the world of music, creating his upcoming album Mission Creep, which he described as a “mini mid-life crisis”.
Speaking in interviews, the actor described being inspired by partner Helen and finding a new creative direction following her death. Lewis has also joked that he's definitely not a star like Bruce Springsteen: "This is a mini mid-life crisis, but it’s not a full-blown mid-life crisis."
The musical career could be inspired by new girlfriend Alison Mosshart, as the pair confirmed their relationship earlier this year. The pair are understood to have met through mutual friends while in the UK earlier this year.
Alison is an American songwriter and the lead vocalist for The Kills - an indie rock band founded by the star and Kate Moss' ex-husband Jamie Hince.