British cycling legend Chris Hoy tragically broke down and opened up on how he lived through the ‘denial phase’ after the death of his close friend and cycling journalist Richard Moore.
Hoy appeared on The Breakdown podcast series to discuss the tragic events. Moore died suddenly aged just 48 last month, and he had established himself as an international bike racer and writer through the foundation of the Cycling Podcast, which he launched alongside Daniel Friebe and Lionel Birnie in 2013.
Hoy, an 11-time world champion and six-time Olympic champion, admirably shed light on his feelings in the aftermath of Moore’s death. Talking to Orla Chennaoui and Greg Rutherford on Eurosport's new podcast series, The Breakdown, Hoy said: “You can’t get your head around the fact you’re not going to see him again and that is the real kicker.
“You get the call yesterday and you’re in shock then you suddenly think maybe it’s a mistake. You go through this denial phase – it must be someone else, it must be someone with the same name, a different family. Someone’s got it wrong.
“Then you slow it down to it is actually happening. It is horrendous.
“Then your heart breaks for his wife – for Virginie and for his son, Maxime. You think it’s just not fair.”
Hoy’s honest and relatable assessment of his feelings highlights how even sporting heroes deal with very real grief and trauma. The 46-year-old simply lamented the fragility of life given Moore died suddenly while asleep, but he did explain how the words of esteemed sports psychiatrist Steve Peters had helped him.
“One of the first things that Steve Peters ever said to me was, life's not fair,” Hoy recalled. “Why do you expect it to be fair? It's not. You can stomp your feet and you can have a little tantrum, but it's not going to change anything. The sooner you accept that, the better. It’s unreal at this stage.
“He was 48. He passed away in his sleep. He would have known nothing about it which is this one mercy of it all. But for those left behind, there's so many questions.
“The worst thing about it for me - you immediately think I wish I told him how much he meant to me. I just had so much respect and love for the guy. He was just an amazing individual, amazing human being.
“We had so many fun times and racing trips. He was there for all the big races. [He was] one of the first people you saw after you finish a race. You come down to the track centre. All the journalists are there and he's the one you got to speak to first because he was the one that's been with you from day one.”
The Scot revealed Moore’s parents lived in close proximity to Hoy’s own mum and dad, and he commented on how remarkable it was that the two men’s careers remained intertwined through cycling and journalism.
“He wrote my autobiography with me,” Hoy added. “We did Heroes, Villains and Velodromes together. He came out to Bolivia to the world record attempt in the Le Paz.
“It’s just unfathomable what's happened. I know that every day people are losing people and it doesn't make it any easier. The one thing you think if you knew when your time was coming, you would just not worry about all the little stupid things that stress you out and that are so trivial.
“But you were saying it to me just before we started recording and alluded to it just now as well. Sometimes we shouldn't just shouldn't battle through it, we've actually reached out to just grief and allow ourselves to accept it, that it's unfair that life is hard.”
