Zoe Nickless and her husband Ben have welcomed their miracle baby after years of heartache trying to conceive. The couple had been trying to get pregnant for some years before being told they would be unable to conceive naturally in 2011.
They tried artificial insemination (IUI), but were left devastated when they found out it had "failed". When Zoe's father died they stopped trying for a baby but decided to start back up again in 2019 when they gave IVF a go.
Sadly, this had also "failed", leaving Zoe and Ben not wanting to try again. Zoe, 37, describes this period of her life as being "emotionally and physically draining".
The couple decided to have a fresh start and moved from Devon to Chester in early 2020. But it wasn't long before they realised "something was missing".
Zoe said: "It was very difficult seeing everyone enjoying their time and it was very apparent something was missing in our life and we hadn't actually given up trying for a baby." When lockdown lifted they gave IVF another try and Zoe fell pregnant but at 13 weeks, they were told their baby boy was extremely poorly.
Speaking to the Liverpool Echo, Zoe said: "It took 11 weeks to get a diagnosis because it was so rare. While we were trying to decide what to do for him, he died at 25 weeks. It was the worst experience of our lives after all these years of trying."
A friend suggested they set up a Go Fund Me page to help in raising funds for the expensive treatment. They raised £8,000 in just four weeks, Zoe said it was "insane".
She added: "We tried another round at a different clinic and it didn't work but they let us try again. It was an overwhelming time.
"It ended up being third time lucky after Billy and we managed to get there. I keep saying this isn't just our baby it's a lot of people's baby. We almost gave up after Billy died."
Teddy was born on June 15, and the delighted parents are sharing their journey in the hopes of raising awareness of IVF treatment. Zoe said: "My husband was on Britain's Got Talent last year and the day of, we just found out we had another negative pregnancy test and it was really hard."
Despite the struggles, Ben Nickless made it to the final of BGT last year after impressing the judges with his impressions. In her advice, Zoe said: "A lot of people say to keep going but it's not always possible. We gave up, not everyone can afford to do that, it's a postcode lottery.
"When all you see are prams or pregnant people and that's all you want, it's devastating. People who go through fertility go through the same roller coaster of emotions as people with cancer. It's quite shocking, and I've been there.
"Even with lockdown, people having lockdown babies, it was really frustrating to see people get pregnant and not endure years of tests, tablets and scans. And when we got pregnant and made it to 12 weeks, everyone said that's a hurdle over but that's when we found out everything was wrong.
"Not everyone does get this bad luck though, we were told it's extremely bad luck but it's important to make time for yourself. Don't worry about others, look after your own emotions."
According to GoFundMe, thousands of fundraisers have been created in recent years mentioning ‘IVF’ as more families use crowdfunding as a means of paying for their fertility care. For those successful in funding their treatment, many IVF patients now have children thanks to money raised online.
So far in 2023 GoFundMe has seen a 52% increase in the number of donations to fundraisers mentioning IVF, IUI or fertility treatment.
