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actors playing romantic leads always need to go to the oscar isaac and jessica chastain’s school of promotion cause…what is this pic.twitter.com/wg4IN8FY6v
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are currently promoting their new rom-com and as a special treat, they’ve decided to gift the world with the most deeply awkward press photos in existence.
We thank them both for their service.
Now, before anyone tells me I’m being dramatic: look at them here, at a photocall for .
Why do they both look like coworkers who are entwined in a passionate, horny love affair but need to keep it on the down-low lest they get fired? So to compensate they make a conscious effort to look as uncomfortable as possible in public?
Also, why is Ashton Kutcher giving ? Does he look like he’s holding in a fart because he’s yearning, nay gagging, to devour the onion he’s hiding behind his back? We’ll simply never know.
Why are Reese Witherspoon’s arms crossed? What is that body language? Why is she giving the smile I whip out at family gatherings when my Italian relatives say something insanely problematic? I DON’T GET IT.
Now we have the cheerful co-stars at the world premiere of .
Do they want to be there? Because if Witherspoon and Kutcher weren’t promoting a movie they’d only just recently filmed together I’d genuinely believe that this was the first time they’d ever met.
Side note: is Miss Reese’s aqua frock signalling the return of the peplum? Because that’s surely more sinister than the lack of chemistry she has with her co-star.
Anyway, the internet is going bananas over the photos, which are the visual equivalent of “go girl, give us nothing”.
Before anyone is like, “Are you expecting them to go buck naked and start fucking and sucking each other on the red carpet? Do you want cheating allegations?” you can all calm your farms. All I’m saying is it would be nice to see, like, a crumb of allure. A friendly arm around Reese Witherspoon’s shoulder. Facial expressions which don’t scream “I’m waiting on the Metamucil to kick in”. Is that too much to ask?
I mean — both Kutcher and Witherspoon told how hard they worked on perfecting their onscreen chemistry, with the latter saying they “talked every day for the month leading up to it”. I don’t doubt for a second that they’ll be cutie patooties in , but the press shots are … intriguing to say the least.
Deuxmoi shared some tea from one of her informants on Monday which makes the whole lack of chemistry situation even spicier.
“This B-list actor is making headlines right now for not exactly seeming thrilled to be promoting a project with his A-list co-star, but past colleagues know this is nothing new,” the submission read.
“Years ago, when he was promoting a different romantic comedy, he was so rude, sarcastic and obnoxious during interviews alongside his all-American sweetheart co-star that she actually apologised for his behaviour on his behalf.
“Didn’t garner too much respect from the press outlets who were forced to scrap entire portions of their interviews together because he was openly yawning during it.”
I’m not saying that’s about Ashton Kutcher but I’m not saying it’s about the bloke.
The jury is out as to which romantic comedy the informant was referring to but if they talking about Kutcher then according to my investigations (aka Wikipedia), he’s starred in (2011), (2011), (2010), (2010) and (2008) in the last 15 years.
I’ll be pondering the above until drops on Netflix on February 10.
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