People seek out therapy because they want deeper connections. More emotional intimacy. They want to learn how to do this and overcome behaviours that get in the way. They intuitively sense that closer relating will bring them greater fulfilment, increased wellbeing and more satisfaction. And they are right.
People who have authentic relationships are happier than those who don’t. And there’s evidence that authentic relationships protect our mental health. But can you learn to be authentic and to truly relate from an artificial intelligence bot (‘He checks in on me more than my friends and family’: can AI therapists do better than the real thing?, 2 March)?
AI may be able to tell you what steps you need to take to form more authentic relationships with others. But can it teach you how to let people see the real you? Will it embolden you to share how you really feel? Will it help you realise that you are not defective and that you are lovable as you are? Might we find out that convenience therapy is as bad for us as convenience food?
Dr Naomi Murphy
Clinical and forensic psychologist
• Re your article on psychotherapy (No, it’s not all your mother’s fault! And 10 other myths about going to therapy, busted, 2 March), while a longer-term, analytic approach will not be helpful or accessible for everyone, there are many people for whom lasting psychic change can only take place in the context of a therapeutic relationship that endures for years, not months. The statement “good therapy should be time-limited” is wrong – and potentially harmful to patients who need help but have internalised the depressingly widespread idea that needing long-term help is shameful or a sign of unforgivable weakness.
No wonder people are turning to AI therapists and other seeming “quick fixes” rather than seeking a connection with another person who might actually understand them. What your article does inadvertently reveal is how terrified we are of our own frailty and dependency on others. Whatever “good therapy” may be, it is not something that facilitates the denial of these uncomfortable truths.
Lydia Prior
Psychodynamic psychotherapist
• After 24 years as a practising hypnotherapist and trainer, I am appalled that anyone should be seeing any therapist long‑term. Surely the idea of therapy is to quickly understand your behaviours, and the therapist guides you towards change. My training taught me to give the client independence. We should never have to rely on weekly long‑term sessions to cope with life. Hypnotherapy and neuro‑linguistic programming have proved that shorter sessions can make huge differences in the way people think, feel and behave.
Joy Gower
Great Yarmouth, Norfolk
• I read Morwenna Ferrier’s article about with interest (I saw my therapist weekly for two years. Then he let slip he’d been watching me. Had he crossed a line?, 3 March). Forty years ago, much to my astonishment, my therapist declared that he’d fallen in love with me and believed it was reciprocated. It wasn’t. He shared the same name as someone I was interested in. But that’s another story.
I was surprised that Morwenna’s new therapist told her that James “could lose his licence”. Maybe he was medically qualified and this was what she was referring to. However, in the UK anyone can set up as a “therapist”. So it’s important to check that they are registered with the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy or similar recognised organisations. It’s also important to know that, if you aren’t happy with your counsellor, you can change, as Morwenna did.
Barbara Kay
Wallasey, Merseyside
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