Ever had a weekend morning where you just wanted to snuggle your pillow and go deeper into the covers? That’s just an amazing feeling, after a long working week. But what if your partner had other plans? We’ve all been there: it’s Saturday, the sun is barely up and, for some weird reason, your partner wakes you up, insisting it’s time to get moving. While it may be okay once or twice, what if this becomes a habit and goes beyond a simple inconvenience, feeling downright disrespectful?
More info: Reddit
One woman shares her frustration with her boyfriend for not letting her sleep in on weekends, causing conflict in their relationship
Image credits: Alex Green (not the actual photo)
The girlfriend enjoys a good sleep on weekends, but her boyfriend keeps waking her up for no reason, even though she repeatedly tells him to stop
Image credits: ThrowRA_NC92
Image credits: Acharaporn Kamornboonyarush (not the actual photo)
Image credits: ThrowRA_NC92
Image credits: Helena Lopes (not the actual photo)
Image credits: ThrowRA_NC92
The boyfriend ignores his girlfriend’s need for sleep, insisting on making her get up for absolutely no reason, and says she is acting childish
One woman took to the internet to share her frustration with her early bird boyfriend. The OP, let’s call her Jane, loves her weekend sleep-ins. During the week, she’s up by 7 AM for work, so those rare mornings when she can snooze until 9:30 or even 10 are pure bliss. Enter Mike, (not his real name but let’s roll with it) her boyfriend who moved in with her a few months earlier. Mike is an early riser, up at 7 AM every day, weekends included. This difference in morning routines has sparked more than a few arguments, as Jane has started to become annoyed by her beau’s nasty wake-up call habit.
Jane’s typical weekend scenario, when she has no plans for the morning, is to sleep in as much as she can – and she really looks forward to those Saturdays and Sundays. Mike, however, waking up very early even on his days off, has acquired the weird habit of waking his girlfriend up at every chance. Why, you may ask? Well, Mike claims they need to prepare for something happening hours later. Jane has tried plenty of times to set some boundaries by clearly stating her intentions to sleep in. She has told her boyfriend that she wants (and needs) to sleep in on weekends, but every time her requests have been ignored by Mike.
Jane’s breaking point was on Mother’s Day (Sunday), when Mike’s early wake-up call was the last straw. Jane spent all of Saturday cleaning and prepping for a family lunch the next day. She went to bed excited about a well-deserved sleep-in. But Sunday morning, Mike flicked her nose at 9 AM, one hour before her alarm, saying they needed to get ready. Jane completely lost it at that moment and started to cry, justifiably asking herself “Why can’t he just let me sleep until an alarm I set goes off?”. Mike brushed off her feelings, calling her reaction childish and insisting he was just being helpful.
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Experts at The Gottman Institute say this isn’t just about sleep—it’s about respect and personal boundaries. “If our partners are unwilling to meet our needs, the relationship cannot thrive. Working together to meet each other’s needs is a dance that can create a meaningful and lasting relationship.”
Clear, empathetic communication and flexibility are key to lasting relationships and the partners should find a compromise that respects both their needs and wishes. For Jane and Mike, this could mean setting a no-wake-up-before-X-time rule or finding solo morning activities for Mike – like going for a run, reading, or other quiet activities, until Jane wakes up.
At the heart of Jane and Mike’s conflict is a need for mutual respect and understanding. Jane’s wish for sleeping in isn’t an overreaction but a legitimate need for rest. Addressing this issue head-on and finding a compromise can help couples like Jane and Mike strengthen their relationship.
Couples’ therapist Kyle Benson advises people to pay attention to what may seem insignificant, as even little moments can have a big impact. “If you want a better relationship, including healthier conflict, you need to be intentional about cueing into your partner’s bids for attention as well as being direct about yours. Couples who have a wealth of goodwill, connection, and affection can withdraw on those positive feelings in moments of conflict, regardless of the topic”, Benson states.
Remember, it’s never just about the extra sleep—it’s about respecting each other’s space and needs. So next weekend, if your partner wants to sleep in, let them. Trust us, they’ll appreciate it.
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People in the comments side with the girlfriend saying she is not overreacting and that she should put her foot down with the early-bird boyfriend
