Nick Anderton says his aim is to resume his playing career with the Bristol Rovers defender awaiting an operation after his cancer diagnosis.
The 26-year-old has been "blown away" by the support he has received after revealing his condition in July. The defender, a stalwart of Rovers' promotion-winning campaign last season, has osteosarcoma, a rare form of bone cancer in his femur.
He reported pain in his knee that had been rumbling on for a few months to Rovers' medical staff after coming back for pre-season training and a routine scan to check it out revealed a tumour.
The former Preston North End, Blackpool and Carlisle defender is set to have an operation at the end of September to remove part of the bone. A donor bone has been identified and Anderton is feeling positive and optimistic about the future.
But, speaking to BBC Radio Bristol in his first interview since announcing his diagnosis, Anderton – who has a soon-to-be two-year-old daughter and another child on the way – admits recent months have been challenging for him and his loved ones.
"As you can imagine, it’s been an up and down couple of months for me and my family," he said. "It was a massive, massive shock.
"I had a bit of a sore knee that I had for a few months from January last season. It was nothing out of the ordinary that I thought was anything to be concerned with and I even came back for the first four days of pre-season and then I had a bit of discomfort. I got sent for a scan, more precautionary, and that’s where it unfolded from.
"We were meant to play Melksham (on July 1) and that’s when I went to see the physio just beforehand. He said ‘Don’t play tonight, there’s no point if you’ve got a bit of a niggle. We’ll send you for a scan’.
"The doctor called me on the Sunday and said ‘Are you in Bristol? Can you come to the training ground? I need to speak to you. Come with your family.’ I was like ‘Wow’. Me and my girlfriend drove down and it was one of those conversations that had to be had face to face and I appreciate the doc for doing that.
"If I’m totally honest, the thing I said to him was ‘I just want to be alive’. Footy went out the window; I’ve got a daughter who is nearly two so that was my initial thought.
"That evening before I had the scans the next day was tough. But since then, hopefully we’ve got a plan in place to move forward and get out the other side.
"Stuart Leake, the physio at Bristol Rovers, and Ian Ferguson, have been unbelievable. If I wasn’t playing footy and training every day, I don’t think I would have realised that I had this problem."
Anderton played 39 times for the Gas last season after joining on a two-year contract following a stint at Carlisle United. He scored three goals, including the winner at Harrogate Town in October, which proved to be a turning point in Rovers' season.
He was back at the Mem on September 3 to see a game for the first time since his diagnosis, watching his teammates draw 2-2 with Morecambe.
Anderton says he has had to be strong for his young family and he has overcome the shock of his diagnosis. A few months on, he feels well physically and he is looking forward to a bright future with his girlfriend and children.
His manager, Joey Barton, has previously said the operation could mean Anderton may not walk for a year, but in trademark dogged style, the tough-tackling, big-hearted defender is not giving up; he wants to play again.
"I’m great," he said. "It might sound funny, but I’m feeling good mentally and physically I’m feeling OK. I’m just awaiting my op now. It should be the end of September when I have to have part of the bone removed and a donor bone put in.
"I’ve gotten over the initial shock of everything and I’ve got my head down now and I’m going to tackle it head-on.
"The shock and the unknown was the scary part of things, but now we have a plan and hopefully we’re going to execute it.
"Every now and then, I would have done (felt angry) initially. I don’t now because my aim is to get out the other side, have a successful operation and have a healthy life, and my aim is to hopefully play again because there is no reason why you can’t.
"Some might say you’ve not got much of a chance, but you can always do something."
Anderton says doctors have told him just 30 people in the past 30 years in the UK have had the same type of osteosarcoma as him and he was faced with two options: a knee replacement, or the removal of part of the femur connected to the knee that will be replaced by a donor bone.
He has chosen the latter and specialists have informed him there is a 95 per cent chance the cancer will not return if the operation goes to plan.
Anderton has thanked his teammates, particularly housemates Sam Finley and Paul Coutts – the latter he refers to as "uncle" – as well as Aaron Collins. The pair have a close bond and they were the stars of the iconic scenes on Gloucester Road after Rovers' won promotion to League One on the final day of last season in May.
Collins showed his support for his mate in touching fashion when he scored on the opening day of the season against Forest Green Rovers, running to the touchline to grab a No. 16 shirt with Anderton's name on the back and raising it to the stands.
Supporters continue to show their support for Anderton, applauding at every home game when the match clock hits 16 minutes. Messages of encouragement have also flooded in from around the world with the football family uniting in support for one of their own.
"I was blown away with the amount of messages that I’ve had from football clubs and people all around the world," Anderton said. "I still haven’t managed to read them all, to be honest. It’s been humbling.
"It’s been unbelievable. The support I’ve had from every single Gashead and the messages me and my family have had blown me away. I really appreciate it. Everyone has been top class.
"Initially, I just wanted to stay away from football because with last season and the promotion, I was looking forward to getting back involved and I had a vision of carrying on where we left off, and then the news (came).
"But that game against Forest Green, I did watch it at home and I had to turn it off when Az put the shirt up because that got to me. Aaron is a good mate of mine and we had a right go at the end of last year with those celebrations and it meant a lot.
"It was kind of strange, we had a conversation a couple of days before and he said that would happen and it did."
Barton's support has been invaluable for Anderton in tough times, too. The manager paid for him to join Rovers in Portugal for their pre-season training camp.
Barton has also committed to raising money by selling memorabilia from his playing career as well as running the London Marathon to raise money for Anderton and his family.
"I couldn’t have asked for any more, to be honest," Anderton added.
"When I went to see the physio on the Friday when we were meant to play Melksham, the gaffer was actually in the physio room and the gaffer was going ‘Melksham knee? Have you got a sore knee and don’t fancy it?’ We had a bit of a joke about it because we didn’t know the severity of it.
"When I found out, I called him and he knew already. I spoke to him and we went out Portugal for pre-season and he sorted that out and it was brilliant. He was brilliant for me."
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