A Swansea woman whose husband-to-be left her on her wedding day is determined to keep her head up this Christmas. Kayley Stead, 27, was praised by people all around the world for turning what could have been a heart-breaking day into a wonderful occasion with family and friends - and is staying positive and focusing on her family this year.
Kayley, from Portmead, is looking forward to spending Christmas with her parents and 21-year-old niece. The family have had a tough year with Kayley's mother being seriously ill, so the family are looking forward to spending quality time together - though Kayley admits it will be a different Christmas to what she had been expecting for much of the year.
“It’s different to what I expected but I’m looking forward to a family Christmas,” Kayley said. “At the beginning of the year, I obviously thought I’d be married and spending Christmas with Kallum [Kayley’s ex-partner]. But at the beginning of 2021, I nearly lost my mum. She had pneumonia which has caused lasting damage, so I’m grateful she’s here this Christmas.”
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Whilst Kayley had expected this year to be a romantic Christmas, her first as a wife, she is finding Christmas magic elsewhere. “The magic of Christmas is about family, it’s a different kind of magic,” she said. “[With mum being ill] it puts things into perspective, family us what Christmas is really about.
“Mum isn’t able to stand up in the kitchen for long and won’t be able to cook Christmas dinner like she usually does, so we’re going out for Christmas Dinner this year, we’re going to The Welcome Inn in Treboeth.” Kayley added. “They’re offering seven courses, it’s going to be a complete experience!
“I want mum to be looked after and not stressed out like she usually is! It’s also an opportunity for her to dress up and I’ll do her make up! One of my sisters and a few of my nieces will join us for dinner as well.”
Asked how she has coped with the breakdown of her relationship, which unfortunately took place on the Wedding Day itself when Kayley heard from her husband-to-be’s family that he had left overnight and had changed his mind on getting married, Kayley said it was “hard” to move forward – and admitted she did seek professional help.
“It was hard, not going to lie. Luckily, my workplace [in the insurance sector] offers confidential therapy – and I’ve always said to family and friends that if you need therapy or help for your mental health, you just need to do that. It was just hard taking my own advice!” she said. “But therapy really helped, I had to look at the break-up as grief. Grief isn’t just about death, grief is also the loss of a relationship, loss of a job or loss of money… when I admitted that to myself, it was a turn in the road!”
In November, Kayley and her best friend went away to New York for a few days. Kayley’s previous partner had visited previously – and hadn’t liked it – so Kayley never thought she’d get the opportunity to go.
“We went away for a few days and it was the best experience I’ve ever had. I never thought I’d get to go because Kallum had been before and he didn’t like it, so I didn’t think we’d ever go,” Kayley said. “But we [me and my best friend] went and I went to Times Square and I love movies and got to see loads of places. And I spent a bit of time on my own as well. [That taught me] that I’m actually okay on my own.”
What Kayley has planned for 2023
Looking ahead to 2023, Kayley doesn’t have any set plans – but is hoping to go on holiday with a few friends. After news of her partner jilting her on her wedding day went viral, Kayley appeared on ITV’s This Morning – and was gifted £2,000 towards a honeymoon.
Kayley says she didn’t want to go on a honeymoon straight away - so is yet to spend the money - but has decided to put the money towards a big trip with her friends, somewhere hot and far-away like Bali or Thailand.
Whilst she has been on one date in the last couple of months, she realised she isn’t ready to get back into the dating scene yet. “I’m not ready for it yet,” she said. “I’ve been on one date and it just showed me I’m not ready. Kallum and I were together nearly four years, it’s a long time.”
Reflecting on the last couple of years, Kayley added: “We’ve had Covid and the Cost of Living Crisis. People have lost people, they’ve lost money, they’ve lost independence. Sometimes we get caught up on what we’ve lost, that we don’t see what we do have.
“Usually, I would be opening presents with my boyfriend and they were always quite personal presents. I’m not going to get that this year, but I’ve found a new love for my parents and I’ll have Christmas with my family.”
Kayley would urge anyone facing Christmas alone, newly single or in a different situation to what they were expecting to reach out for help if they need it.
“You’re allowed five minutes of crying, if you need it,” she said. “Crying helps sometimes. [After that], reach out to someone – a friend or family member. They should help you, and if they don’t, then you don’t need them around you.”
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