Ahh, mothers. The greatest critic, yet biggest supporter.
A figure unmatched in her ability to make us feel loved and safe, as well as deathly afraid. The person who brought us into this world, and when we were misbehaving, often threatened to take us out of it.
Last week, we took a walk down memory lane to remember the harsh words our mothers had for us as kids. From health and safety warnings to disciplinary threats, our mums came out with all sorts to keep us in line as we grew up in Northern Ireland.
Now, Belfast Live readers have weighed in with even more words of warning uttered by their mums. Be they orders, fed-up remarks about the rest of the household's bad habits or threats of impending violence, your mums came out with some gems.
On site, Belfast Live user Niknak85 said their mum used to say, "if you crack that chewing gum once more I'll crack your jaw." They clarified that they never actually got their jaw cracked, for anyone concerned.
One thing our readers' mums were sick of them doing was not closing the door after themselves. And according to comments on our Facebook, mums tried various phrases to get the message across, such as:
- "Were you born in a field? Close that door!" - submitted by Norman Morrow
"Close that door for yer letting all the heat out!" - submitted by Surita Lynn
- "Were you born in a field with no gate?" - submitted by Ellen Allen
"Were ya born in a field with automatic gates?" - submitted by Nikaela Simpson
- "Would you put the bit of wood in the hole!" - submitted by Marie Massey
Another bad habit kids and teens got into was not outing the lights or turning on more lights than necessary. As the household members who had to face the electricity bill the rest of yous ran up, your parents made their frustrations known through the likes of the following:
- "Do you think we live in a lighthouse, turn the big light off!" - submitted by Dawn Bothwell
- "It's like the illuminations in here!" - submitted by Elaine Bates
- "This house is like a house of lights! I only work for the electric company, I don’t own it!" - submitted by Norman Morrow
It was also time to scarper when mum demanded to know who left the immersion on, as pointed out by Steph Nash.
Last week we remembered our mums warning us of a chill in our kidneys if we sat outside for too long. Facebook commenters reminded us of similarly unusual health warnings, like how sitting on a cold step would lead to piles and picking your nose would cause your eye to fall out.
Other words of wisdom pertaining to safety included taking your coat off indoors so that you'd feel the benefit outside and not sitting too close to the telly for fear of square eyes.
Many comments spoke of mums threatening to wipe the smile off their children's faces if they didn't do so themselves, or threatening to put the smile on "the other side of your face". Another threat that frequently appeared in the comments was: "If you don't stop crying, I'll give you something to cry about."
Several readers wrote that their mum would put the fear of God in them with "wait 'til yer Da gets home", or, if out and about, "just wait 'til I get you home". Yet for many others, no words were even necessary - "The Look" was all it took to scare you straight and hope being extra good made up for whatever caused her to shoot it to you.
In hard times, fussy eaters had no place at the dinner table. A number of readers said their mums warned them to "eat it before it eats you", threatened to force-feed them or guilt-tripped them by reminding them of those less fortunate with nothing to eat.
The 'Final Destination' franchise also had nothing on our readers' mothers. Some of their colourful ways of telling you to leave them be could've resulted in death, such as:
- "Away and play with the buses" - submitted by Pamela Frew
- "Away an' walk 'round the Lagan 'til yer hat floats" - submitted by Jill Thompson
- "Away and play on the railway track" - submitted by Paula Hayes
If they didn't tell you to choose a disastrous play area, they threatened to enact the violence themselves. Jim Rainey wrote that his mother warned, "Don’t anger me with a knife in my hand!" while other users said they were threatened with a slipper, a variety of kitchen utensils, a toe up the backside or their mother's bare hand.
Sometimes the violent threats were actually followed through on. Amanda McCandless wrote she was told, "Don't. You. Dare. Disobey. Me. Again." with each full stop representing a whack of the wooden spoon, while Neil Robinson added: "When in big trouble I'd always hope her sentences were short 'cus you got walloped for every word that came out of her mouth."
What other threats or warnings did you get off your parents whilst growing up in Northern Ireland? Let us know in the comments below.
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