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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Entertainment
Blake Morrison

Before the Light Fades by Natasha Walter review – love and resistance

Natasha Walter.
Heartfelt insights … Natasha Walter. Photograph: Katherine Anne Rose/The Observer

Natasha Walter didn’t listen when her mother, Ruth, talked of killing herself. She’d been saying it for years and though she complained of suffering from dementia there had been no formal diagnosis and her memory lapses weren’t unusual for a 75-year-old. Besides, would someone so timid and anxious have the nerve? Ruth loved her two daughters and her grandchildren, and she thought of her life as happy: why bring it to a premature end?

But there had been warning signs: the pieces of jewellery she gave away; the lunch to which she invited all the family despite the lack of an occasion to celebrate; her refusal to make plans for the future. Worried, Natasha took her to lunch one day, at the end of which Ruth told her where to find the key to her locked cabinet if ever she needed it. Natasha didn’t listen to that either. Four days later Ruth took her own life, using a substance she had ordered on the internet years before.

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