Do any of you still get the old Radio Times and gently thumb through its pages while circling the occasional programme that might tickle your fancy?
“Ooh, look Doreen, that documentary on the Chopin Etudes is on this Thursday just after we get back from the cribbage club,” said an imaginary figure in a made-up conversation in my head. Now, there’s a worrying insight into the workings of my tortured mind.
Of course, in this gee-whiz world of gadgets and gizmos, the process of pawing away at a printed series of TV listings is about as archaic as birling a sodden semmit through a creaking hand-cranked mangle.
Those of you who still savour this cherished procedure – circling the Radio Times that is, not using the mangle - may have performed such a task the other night when BBC 2 had highlights of the AIG Women’s Open.
They were on just before midnight, after a film called Ammonite which apparently told the tale of how a fossil hunter’s solitary existence was changed by the arrival of a palaeontologist’s wife.
Anyway, we all know that golf on terrestrial tele in the UK has experienced the same kind of extinction-level event that obliterated T-Rex and his cronies. When the Beeb does show the odd morsel, the graveyard slot that it shoves golf into hardly makes it a can’t-miss programme.
Harrumphing about the lack of gowf on the conventional idiot box is a pastime older than the fossilised remnants of a bloomin’ Sauropod. I was often of the opinion that certain sports which get exposure in the broad-church of terrestrial television gain a clear benefit in terms of public consciousness. Golf on a subscription channel, meanwhile, is essentially preaching to the disciples of the niche parishes.
It can be easy, therefore, to grumble but, as Martin Slumbers, the chief executive of The R&A, said on the subject at last month’s Open, “you can only consider a terrestrial free to air offering if there is one put on the table, and there isn't one at the moment.”
In this sense, then, perhaps I’m just some stuck-in-the-past fuddy duddy. Let’s face it, the world of golf is populated by a huge proportion of over-50s and many of them will probably insist that coverage of the game on terrestrial tele is the only way to get into the hearts and minds of the young. They’ll no doubt think that the yoof still get updates on current affairs from John Craven’s Newsround too.
But ask any youngster these days if they actually sit down and watch much traditional TV and they’ll probably look at you quizzically as if you’re some relic of yore that wears a stove pipe hat and polishes a musket. It’s all streaming here, downloads there and swiping phones everywhere.
Golf has never been more focussed on engaging with new audiences than now. Recognising modern media streams and acknowledging the considerable influence such platforms have in driving interest among the young is significant part of the mission to, as they say, grow the game.
Rather like the different ways people now experience golf – ranges, simulators or golf entertainment facilities instead of traditional formats – the way we consume the stick and ba’ game continues to evolve.
Evolution was the name of the game at Walton Heath last week. By all accounts, the AIG Women’s Open was a rip-roaring success. Big names, big crowds and a big prize pot of $9 million underlined the mighty strides the event has made over the years. The R&A made a big play too of its slogan, ‘Golf. Opened Up’ as the powers-that-be strived to create a come-all-ye, family-friendly experience.
Local heroine Charley Hull, meanwhile, appeared genuinely gobsmacked by the volume of starry eyed young ‘uns in the galleries. "I was shocked how many young kids came up to me and it's kind of cool how they are looking up to me now,” said Hull, who would eventually finish second to the brilliant American, Lilia Vu.
Hull’s rousing title tilt was certainly inspiring but where it sat in the wider scheme of sport underlined the on-going issue golf faces. Playing her way into the final group for the closing day of a major was the equivalent of, say, a British tennis player getting to the final of Wimbledon. And we all know what the reaction would’ve been if that had happened at SW19.
Blimey, Emma Raducanu or Heather Watson merely need to win a set and it just about sparks a jubilant flotilla down the Thames amid a pandemonium of publicity.
Even on social media, that great arena of panting hysteria, there was a fairly modest level of excitement as Hull moved into contention for the biggest victory of her career.
If a British female athlete is chasing down glory in one sport or another, there can often be a tsunami of wide-ranging support flooding in from well-known competitors from other pursuits. Even grinning celebrity figures jump on the bandwagon and shove up giddy posts along the lines of, “I’d never watched women’s underwater quoits before but, wow, I’m now hooked #letsgogirls.”
I’m being flippant but you get the idea. As for golf, however? Well, it still struggles to make an impact outside its own bubble. Why that continues to be the case? Answers on a postcard, please.
