Not content with invading our eardrums every Christmas, Michael Bublé has found a new festive side-hustle with which to entertain himself over November and December: chief quality control officer at Asda.
Sorry, what? Indeed. Not content with transporting Will Ferrell’s Buddy the Elf into an Asda store via all sorts of technological wizardry last year, this time around Asda have one-upped themselves by bringing Bublé on board – though how well this goes down will likely depend on how much you love his music, and how much you think it sounds like naff wrapped up in tinsel.
This year’s trailer (yes, we have trailers for Christmas ads now, this is the world we live in) showed Asda staff experiencing the uniquely terrifying phenomenon of approaching a locked door marked ‘Do not open until 1.11.23’ to find none other than a grinning Bublé behind it, ready to assume his role as the company’s festive dictator. For the uninitiated, this means testing all the Asda festive produce to make sure it passes muster.
Why is Bublé locked away in a secret office? I’m not sure. Maybe this will become Asda’s Christmas tradition: much as Mariah Carey magically defrosts herself every November to reassume dominance over the airwaves, perhaps the supermarket will start locking him in the janitor’s closet until the time comes to release him on the mince pies.
And it’s not just the Canadian crooner we have to contend with: there’s star power behind the camera too. Taika Waititi, apparently not satisfied with directing the Amazon Prime ad last year, has been bagged by Asda this year, meaning that the advert is full of Waititi-esque touches, chief among them the inability to take anything too seriously. Bublé tells the Asda team that their panettone needs “more bumph in the rise” (they mysteriously understand exactly what this means), while a quick taste is met with a “jingle my bells, that’s great.”
Clearly, Bublé is having a ball. I was told by the Asda team that it was a lifelong dream of his to say “clean up on aisle five” – that’s one thing he can now tick off the bucket list – along with the chance to show he can poke fun at himself. “I’m so talented,” he crows at one point when asked to pick a fifth cheese for the cheeseboard.
It’s all cheery stuff, but as admirable as the store’s determination is to spotlight their food and staff, it's all a bit... meh. Elf worked because everybody loved the film so much, with Michael Bublé... do we really care about his preference of brandy butter? I'm not sure I do. These Bublés are a bit flat.
