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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Sport
Rob Smyth

Arsenal 4-2 Leicester, Manchester City 4-0 Bournemouth: clockwatch – as it happened

Gabriel Jesus is congratulated by William Saliba after scoring the second of his two goals in Arsenal’s 4-2 win.
Gabriel Jesus is congratulated by William Saliba after scoring the second of his two goals in Arsenal’s 4-2 win over Leicester. Photograph: Shaun Brooks/Action Plus/Shutterstock

That’s it for today’s clockwatch. If you just need one more hit of live football action, you can join Scott Murray for Brentford v Man Utd. Ta-ra!

Wolves 0-0 Fulham

Aleksandar Mitrovic’s late penalty was saved by Jose Sa at Molineux, with Wolves getting their first point of the season as a result.

Southampton 2-2 Leeds

Rodrigo scored twice for Leeds before a late Southampton surge at St Mary’s.

Updated

Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

Brighton dominated at the Amex Stadium but were unable to get past Newcastle’s new No1.

Updated

Manchester City 4-0 Bournemouth

Will Unwin was the Etihad to watch City put Bournemouth away with the minimum of fuss.

Arsenal 4-2 Leicester

Ed Aarons was at the Emirates to watch Arsenal enjoy an entertaining romp in the sunshine.

Brentford v Man Utd A reminder that Cristiano Ronaldo starts in the late game at the Gtech Community Stadium. Grab some popcorn and follow the match with Scott Murray.

Updated

In response to Josse McMahon, and with apologies to everyone else, may I submit this PJ Harvey 11?” writes Brian Sharon.

  1. Meet Ze Roberto

  2. My Beautiful Leao

  3. C’mon Billy Sharp

  4. Shane Long Snake Moan

  5. Send Hislop To Me

  6. The Hasenhüttl And The Hustlers Whore

  7. Is This De Bruyne?

  8. Let Beth England Shake

  9. The Last Living Danny Rose

  10. 50ft Dele

  11. Digne-Na-Gig.

I’ll take this over one of Mac Millings’ ‘humorous’ XIs all season long.

Updated

Full time: Wolves 0-0 Fulham

Another decent result for newly promoted Fulham, though it might have been better: Alexsandar Mitrovic’s late penalty was saved by Jose Sa.

Full time: Southampton 2-2 Leeds

An excellent comeback from Southampton, who were in all sorts before late goals from Joe Aribo and Kyle Walker-Peters earned them a point.

Updated

Full time: Arsenal 4-2 Leicester

Another very good day for New Arsenal. Gabriel Jesus, the darling of the Emirates, scored two and made two on his home debut.

Full time: Man City 4-0 Bournemouth

No goals from Erling Haaland, and barely any touches of the ball, but City still hammered Bournemouth.

Full time: Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

Brighton played very well but couldn’t score. Stop me if you think, etc.

Championship The QPR goalkeeper Seny Diang has scored an injury-time equaliser for QPR at Sunderland. All that next-level coaching from Michael Beale, and then the goalkeeper equalises.

“The assist for the second Southampton goal was Mara, not Aribo,” writes Thom Bilous. “Only sending that because it was an absolutely gorgeous hold up through ball and the creator definitely deserves credit, teeing up Kyle Walker-Peters for a beautiful drilled finish.”

This is why I love Clockwatch – the readers can see what the writer can’t. It’s groundbreaking journalism.

“Don’t know how Barcelona missed this typeface-based epiphany, but it’s definitely one of the very rare little videos to bring warmth to the cockles of the heart,” says Russell Richardson. “Having actually used it in “real life” I can attest it’s 100% true story. How did the club let it slip by?”

Brighton 0-0 Newcastle And now Pascal Gross has missed a superb chance to give Brighton the lead at the Amex Stadium. He’s playing against the wrong United today.

The latest Premier League scores

  • Arsenal 4-2 Leicester

  • Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

  • Man City 4-0 Bournemouth

  • Southampton 2-2 Leeds

  • Wolves 0-0 Fulham

GOAL! Southampton 2-2 Leeds (Walker-Peters 81)

What a comeback from Southampton! Joe Aribo scored one and now he’s made one for Kyle Walker-Peters, who finished emphatically to bring Southampton level.

Southampton's Kyle Walker-Peters celebrates getting the visitors back on level terms.
Southampton's Kyle Walker-Peters celebrates getting the visitors back on level terms. Photograph: Peter Nicholls/Reuters

Updated

Arsenal 4-2 Leicester City Gabriel Jesus has missed a great chance for a hat-trick, shinning a bouncing ball into the side netting from four yards.

Updated

GOAL! Man City 4-0 Bournemouth (Lerma own goal 79)

Joao Cancelo’s cross is turned into his own net by Jefferson Lerma, and City’s Premier League record now reads P2 W2 D0 L0 F6 A0 Pts 6.

Bournemouth's Jefferson Lerma scores an own goal and Manchester City's fourth.
Bournemouth's Jefferson Lerma (centre) scores an own goal and Manchester City's fourth. Photograph: Lee Smith/Action Images/Reuters

Updated

SA SAVES MITROVIC'S PENALTY!

Wolves 0-0 Fulham A big moment at Molineux, where Aleksandra Mitrovic’s penalty has been saved by Jose Sa.

Fulham's Aleksandar Mitrovic has his penalty saved by Wolverhampton Wanderers' keeper Jose Sa.
Wolverhampton Wanderers' keeper Jose Sa keeps the score goal-less, much to the chagrin of Fulham’s Aleksandar Mitrovic. Photograph: Chris Radburn/Reuters

Updated

Man City 3-0 Bournemouth

Erling Haaland misses a great chance and is then substituted. He has eight touches in his 74 minutes on the field.

Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola (right) hugs Erling Haaland after his substitution.
Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola (right) hugs Erling Haaland after his substitution. Photograph: Peter Powell/EPA

Updated

GOAL! Arsenal 4-2 Leicester (Martinelli 76)

For the second time in the game, Leicester get back in the game then concede immediately. Gabriel Jesus (two goals, two assists now) lays the ball square to Martinelli, whose low, left-footed drive goes into the bottom corner.

Arsenal's Gabriel Martinelli fires home their fourth goal.
Arsenal's Gabriel Martinelli fires home their fourth goal. Photograph: Tony Obrien/Reuters

Updated

GOAL! Arsenal 3-2 Leicester (Maddison 74)

Now then. James Maddison has given Leicester a fresh sniff at the Emirates, ramming a deflected crossshot past Aaron Ramsdale.

Updated

GOAL! Southampton 1-2 Leeds (Aribo 72)

Joe Aribo’s first goal for Southampton has given them hope of a comeback against Leeds.

The late game is Brentford v Manchester United, and the team news is just coming in. Scott Murray is following that one.

Bundesliga Ten-man Leipzig drew 2-2 with Koln, with Timo Werner scoring on his second debut for the club. You can see all the other results on our live scores page. That’s not clickbait, by the way, I just can’t be bothered to type Hoffenheim 3-2 Bochum.

Southampton 0-2 Leeds A small bit of good news for Southampton is that their next two games are against fellow Crisis Baton contenders: Leicester away, then Manchester United at home.

Arsenal 3-1 Leicester Arsenal should have had a penalty when Daniel Amartey booted Gabriel Jesus up in the air like an old sock. No idea why VAR didn’t get involved in that one.

Scotland

Another new signing, Antonio Colak, has put Rangers 2-0 up at home to St Johnstone. It’s been a good week at Ibrox.

Updated

GOAL! Southampton 0-2 Leeds (Rodrigo 60)

Two for Leeds, two for Rodrigo. Pascal Struijk was going to score anyway, according to Michael Dawson on Sky Sports, but Rodrigo made sure on the line.

Leeds United's Rodrigo waits at the far post as Pascal Struijk’s shot loops goalwards.
Leeds United's Rodrigo waits at the far post as Pascal Struijk’s shot loops goalwards. Photograph: Peter Nicholls/Reuters
Leeds United's Rodrigo scores their second goal.
And he nods it home just to make sure. Photograph: Peter Nicholls/Reuters
Rodrigo celebrates scoring his second of the afternoon.
Rodrigo celebrates scoring his second of the afternoon. Photograph: Adam Davy/PA

Updated

The latest Premier League scores

  • Arsenal 3-1 Leicester

  • Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

  • Man City 3-0 Bournemouth

  • Southampton 0-1 Leeds

  • Wolves 0-0 Fulham

GOAL! Arsenal 3-1 Leicester (Xhaka 55)

Leicester no longer have a sniff. Ben White’s simple cross is spilled inexplicably by Danny Ward straight to the feet of Gabriel Jesus. He touches it back to give Xhaka an open goal. Sorry to say, that was a bad error from Ward.

Arsenal's Granit Xhaka (left) shoots to score their third goal.
Arsenal's Granit Xhaka (left) shoots to score their third goal. Photograph: Adrian Dennis/AFP/Getty Images
Arsenal's Granit Xhaka celebrates scoring their third goal.
Then celebrates. Photograph: Tony Obrien/Reuters

Updated

GOAL! Arsenal 2-1 Leicester (Saliba 53 og)

Leicester have a sniff at the Emirates. They kept the ball for an age until William Saliba, trying to get in front of Jamie Vardy, stooped to head past Aaron Ramsdale. As own goals go, it wasn’t a shocker; you can see why Saliba felt he had to play the ball.

Arsenal's William Saliba scores an own goal and Leicester City's first.
Arsenal's William Saliba beats Leicester City’s Jamie Vardy to the ball … Photograph: Matthew Childs/Action Images/Reuters
Arsenal's William Saliba scores an own goal and Leicester City's first.
Unfortunately it flies past Aaron Ramsdale and Leicester are back in the game. Photograph: Matthew Childs/Action Images/Reuters

Updated

In Scotland, Rangers lead St Johnstone 1-0 thanks to another goal from their midweek hero Malik Tillman.

Wolves 0-0 Fulham Morgan Gibbs-White has just missed a terrific opportunity to put Wolves in front, it says here.

Man City 3-0 Bournemouth Jack Grealish came on for Phil Foden at half-time, and why not.

“Watching the excellent games so far in PL, should I as a Man Utd fan be panicking?” says Francis Mead. “Look, don’t tell me, I know the answer full well.”

United are still in the race. Sadly it’s with Everton and Southampton, for possession of the Premier League Crisis Baton.

GOAL! Southampton 0-1 Leeds (Rodrigo 46)

Leeds have scored right at the start of the second half. A superb cross from Jack Harrison is tucked away by Rodrigo, his second goal in as many games.

A tidy finish from Leeds United’s Rodrigo puts the visitors ahead at St Mary’s against Southampton.
A tidy finish from Leeds United’s Rodrigo puts the visitors ahead. Photograph: Peter Nicholls/Reuters

Updated

Half-time reading

Updated

Peep peep! These are the half-time scores in the five Premier League games.

  • Arsenal 2-0 Leicester Jesus 2

  • Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

  • Man City 3-0 Bournemouth Gundogan, De Bruyne, Foden

  • Southampton 0-0 Leeds

  • Wolves 0-0 Fulham

A notable scoreline in the Championship: Rotherham 4-0 Reading

You can follow all the games with our live scoreboard.

Rotherham United's Richard Woods heads in the first goal of the game.
Rotherham United's Richard Woods heads in the first goal of the game. Photograph: Isaac Parkin/PA

Updated

Manchester City, 3-0 up against Bournemouth at half-time. Who’ll be playing the Eddie Large role today? It won’t be Jerry Sadowitz, we know that.

Updated

Man City 3-0 Bournemouth “Rob, I know,” says Mary Waltz. “Early days, two games do not make a season, don’t overreact, etc, etc. I don’t care, City is a scary f’n team. They are going to crush all but a handful of teams this season.”

Arsenal 2-0 Leicester The referee gives Leicester a penalty for a foul by Aaron Ramsdale on Jamie Vardy – but it’s overturned after an intervention from the VAR official, Mr Michael Dean. It sounds like Ramsdale pulled out of the challenge, but Vardy’s muscle memory kicked in and he went down anyway.

Updated

The latest Premier League scores

  • Jesus 2-0 Leicester

  • Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

  • Man City 3-0 Bournemouth

  • Southampton 0-0 Leeds

  • Wolves 0-0 Fulham

GOAL! Man City 3-0 Bournemouth (Foden 37)

It’s 3-0 to City, and Beast hasn’t scored any of them. Bournemouth made the mistake of crossing the halfway line and were punished on the break. De Bruyne timed his through pass perfectly to Foden, who forced a shot through Travers.

Phil Foden of Manchester City scores a goal to make it 3-0.
Phil Foden fires in Manchester City’s third. Photograph: Robbie Jay Barratt/AMA/Getty Images

Updated

GOAL! Arsenal 2-0 Leicester (Jesus 35)

Gabriel Jesus gets his second, nodding in from close range after Martinelli’s corner was inadvertently flicked on at the near post by Vardy. There are bigger challenges ahead, but right now Arsenal look a seriously good association football outfit.

Gabriel Jesus nods home his, and Arsenal’s, second goal of the game.
Gabriel Jesus nods home his, and Arsenal’s, second goal of the game. Photograph: Nigel Keene/ProSports/Shutterstock

Updated

“Just had a quick scan through the first few minutes of the Clockwatch and saw references not just to Radiohead but Massive Attack as well,” says Josse McMahon. “ Unbelievable. Now I’m just waiting for someone to mention PJ Harvey and that will be a hat trick of my favourite artists in one afternoon.”

We just need Billy Sharp to bang one in for Sheffield United. Oh hang on, they’re not playing until tomorrow.

GOAL! Man City 2-0 Bournemouth (De Bruyne 31)

City double their lead with a goal of unobtrusive class. De Bruyne moves infield from the right, realises he can’t play Haaland through because he’s offside, and instead waves a shot into the bottom corner with the outside of his right foot.

Kevin De Bruyne of Manchester City scores his side’s second goal.
Kevin De Bruyne doubles Manchester City’s lead with a tidy finish. Photograph: Alex Livesey/Getty Images

Updated

“Timo Werner clearly left his bucket in Leipzig when he left for Chelsea,” says Brendan Large. “Go on Timo!”

I really hope he succeeds. Some of the abuse he received was scandalous.

The latest Premier League scores

  • Arsenal 1-0 Leicester

  • Brighton 0-0 Newcastle

  • Man City 1-0 Bournemouth

  • Southampton 0-0 Leeds

  • Wolves 0-0 Fulham

GOAL! Arsenal 1-0 Leicester (Jesus 23)

A lovely goal from Gabriel Jesus on his home debut. Actually, it might have been deflected, but he’ll not care. He received the ball on the left side of the area, looked up and floated the ball imaginatively across Ward and into the far corner. I think it nicked off Evans, though it’s hard to be sure. Either way, the shot was on target so it’ll go down as Jesus’s goal.

Arsenal’s Gabriel Jesus opens the scoring on his home debut.
Arsenal’s Gabriel Jesus shoots … Photograph: Matthew Childs/Action Images/Reuters
Arsenal’s Gabriel Jesus opens the scoring on his home debut.
And scores on his home debut. Photograph: Andy Rain/EPA

Updated

Man City 1-0 Bournemouth That’s three goals in just over half an hour for Gundogan at the Emirates Etihad, if you include his title-winning heroics against Aston Villa in May.

Updated

GOAL! Man City 1-0 Bournemouth (Gundogan 18)

Erling Haaland literally didn’t touch the ball until the 18th minute, and that’s not an exaggeration, but as soon as he did it let to a goal. Haaland wrestled for the ball and then forced a return pass through to Ilkay Gundogan, who slapped it emphatically past Mark Travers.

Manchester City's Ilkay Gundogan scores their first goal.
Manchester City's Ilkay Gundogan scores their first goal. Photograph: Craig Brough/Reuters
Manchester City's Ilkay Gundogan scores their first goal.
Here’s a view of the finish from the other side of the goal. Photograph: Robbie Jay Barratt/AMA/Getty Images

Updated

Bundesliga Timo Werner has scored on his second debut for RB Leipzig. They’re drawing 1-1 at home to FC Koln, though Dominic Szoboszlai has just been sent off.

Southampton 0-0 Leeds There’s been a VAR check for a Southampton penalty after a tackle by Diego Llorente on Stuart Armstrong. Stockley Park’s finest decided it was a fair challenge.

Brighton 0-0 Newcastle Callum Wilson has had a goal disallowed for a high boot, it says here.

“It’s nice and cool here in Saint Paul, Minnesota, USA, USA, USA, too,” writes Matty Spillum. “Perhaps more telling than whether the pyramid-scheme-unfolding-in-real-time disaster that is Barcelona and their use of a quite expensive looking typeface is their choice of coach Xavi for the graphic, presumably because his image rights are significantly cheaper to use.”

What gives me pause with Barcelona is that a lot of very well-informed folk insist there is nothing to see here, so maybe we’re the clowns here. Who knows.

Man City 0-0 Bournemouth Mark Travers, Bournemouth’s excellent young Irish goalkeeper, has just saved superbly with his legs to deny Phil Foden. City could already be 4-0 up.

“Hey Rob,” says Vibhanshu Bisht. “If you want Comic Sans, the Man Utd game is in the 5.30pm slot.”

The sight of McFred' in Comic Sans would tip some poor soul over the edge.

Updated

“Probably worth noting that the moment they kicked off, Bournemouth went top of the leaguem," says Richard Morris. “Noting quickly as probably not for long.”

“Do you think Neil Warnock’s boat’s engine arrived auto-tuned to ‘Girl I Love You’ by Massive Attack?” says Neill Brown. “I don’t have a speedboat or yacht so I don’t know if you can choose what bassline your engine plays.”

It’s a perfectly reasonable question, so why do I keep reading it as: “Do you think Neil Warnock makes love to ‘I Just Called to Say I Love You’ by Stevie Wonder?”

Man City 0-0 Bournemouth Both City’s centre-halves, Ruben Dias and Nathan Ake, have missed good chances, it also says here.

Arsenal 0-0 Leicester Wesley Fofana has missed a good chance to give Leicester the lead, it says here.

“I bumped into Bruno Lage in a cafe in Tettenhall, Wolverhampton last week,” writes Peter Higginson. “Have you noticed he has incredibly thin and long legs, like a fly! Do you think this is important?”

It is now!

“Good afternoon, Rob!” says Alexandra Ashton. “Following up on Charles’ analysis of the teamsheets posted by various clubs’ social media, I’d like to voice my discontent with Wolves (using a different font for the numbers, captain ©, and the word “substitutes”??) and Bournemouth (I may be blind, but those numbers seem rather hard to read). Conversely, I’m fond of Newcastle’s semi-condensed looking font and very pretty colour scheme. Does this mean anything? Obviously not, but I’ve nothing better to do, so…”

All this font chat has got me looking further afield. Look at Barcelona’s, for example. Can they even afford that font?

The 3pm games are about to start, but let’s attend to more important matters: Grant Tennille has cracked the case of the Brighton/Radiohead font crossover.

Kid A
Radiohead Kid A album cover 2000, created by Thom Yorke and Stanley Donwood Photograph: Parlophone

Aston Villa 2-1 Everton

Andy Hunter was at Villa Park to watch the home side quieten some of the chatter about their manager.

“Hey Rob!” says Joe Pearson. “How smug do you feel to be in Orkney right now, comfortably in the teens when most of the matches will be played in the 30s? Here in Indianapolis, it is an unseasonably cool 64 (19 to you). Location, location, location.”

It does look violently hot at the Emirates in particular. Reminds me of the 2003 Community Shield, when the heat got to Phil Neville and Franny Jeffers.

“Those images of team selections allow a comparison of PR departments’ choice of font and style,” squints Charles Antakia. “ They all go for all-caps, some (Leicester, Leeds) with generous kerning, but Man City suffocatingly tight. Fonts run a scale from boring (Bournemouth) to child-friendly (Brighton). Today’s prize goes to Arsenal, for somehow digging up a font last seen in the spaceship signage of a 1990s sci-fi series.”

Brighton’s looks like a Radiohead font, though I can’t place which one. Any idea? Leicester’s looks like it belongs on the portfolio of a start-up company specialising in eco-friendly toothpaste. Sad to see that none of the teams have gone for Comic Sans. What a humourless society we’ve become.

“Firstly, Neil Warnock is an absolute enigma,” says Matt Dony. “Thoroughly dislikeable, but also at times warm, funny and engaging. I don’t get him. I don’t know how I feel about him. Secondly, I stand by my pre-season prediction that Mitrovic will net eight goals this season, scored either side of a 10-game drought. He’s spaffed two of them already, so don’t expect much from him today. Thirdly, poor Bournemouth. Poor, poor Bournemouth.”

Full time: Aston Villa 2-1 Everton

Aston Villa survived a late Everton onslaught, sparked by the introduction of the new signing Amadou Onana, to win their first home game of the season.

Everton’s next match, at home to Nottingham Forest next weekend, already feels like a biggie.

“Afternoon Rob,” weeps Simon McMahon. “Don’t worry about keeping too close an eye on things in Scotland, as I’m still processing the events of Thursday night as Dundee United have gone from heroes to zeroes in the space of a week, following victory over AZ Alkmaar with defeat at home to Livingston and then a record-equalling pumping in the return leg in Holland on Thursday night.

“No denying it, a proper minter for all concerned with the Tannadice club. Goodness knows what Jim McLean would have made of it. The players will eventually be forced out of hiding to face Hearts at Tynecastle tomorrow. Champions Celtic are at Kilmarnock before that, and today’s games are Aberdeen v Motherwell, Livingston v Hibs, Rangers v St. Johnstone and St. Mirren v Ross County.”

Just watch this on loop for the next forever days.

Updated

In a parallel universe, Neil Warnock is just starting his teamtalk ahead of a tricky match at the Weston Homes Stadium

‘The name’s w****er. Colin w****r’, etc.

Wolves v Fulham team news

Southampton v Leeds team news

Man City v Bournemouth team news

Brighton v Newcastle team news

Arsenal v Leicester team news

On Monday, the Premier League will be 30 years old. Barney Ronay had the unenviable task of condensing three decades of hype and history into a breezy, stylish, intelligent 2,000-word read.

Look out, it’s the Premier League!

Updated

The early Premier League game is at Villa Park, where Aston Villa lead Everton 1-0 at half-time. Scott Murray is watching that one.

Preamble

In decades to come, historians will scratch their heads when they reflect upon the late 2010s and early 2020s. Brexit, Trump, Covid, Johnson, populism, Twitter, post-truth, post-shame, post-dignity – all will defy understanding, in the same way our generation can’t imagine fag smoke wafting round an airplane and up pre-pubescent nostrils before the poor kids had the chance to get addicted to nicotine on their own terms.

Most beard-strokingly of all, the finest minds on the planet will struggle to comprehend that many sensible, erudite people seriously doubted whether Erling Braut Haaland would score goals in industrial quantities at Manchester City.

Haaland’s terrifying double at West Ham last weekend was a statement of the most devastating intent – 34’s the record, since you asked – and it’s a shame Opta don’t have statistics on how well the Bournemouth central defenders slept last night. Jefferson Lerma, Chris Mepham and Lloyd Kelly have the ginormous task of stopping Haaland, who makes his home debut for Manchester City today.

City v Bournemouth – the Eddie Large game - is one of five 3pm kick-offs, all of which are likely to be played in extreme heat. We’ll also keep a side eye on events throughout the EFL, in Scotland and in Europe, but our main focus will be these five Premier League games:

  • Arsenal v Leicester

  • Brighton v Newcastle

  • Man City v Bournemouth

  • Southampton v Leeds

  • Wolves v Fulham

Updated

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