High Road or Low Road?
Mistress of Karmic Balance Q levitates into view
On the post-apocalyptic Great Highway of Election ’26.
Burned out wreckage of previous TOP leaders lines the road
In this harsh, brutal and merciless Mad Max world.
Smitten media hacks flock to Q’s teal-coloured designer chariot.
“Oh Q,” queries an oil-stained Mad Max type hack,
“Will you take the high road or the low road?”
“Neither,” says Q, readjusting the equilibrium of the universe,
“I will take the middle of the road.”
The smitten media hacks cheer and whoop,
Even though they are not entirely clear what this means.
Mistress Q hovers on down the road of electoral fortune.
The sun is shining and the serfs in the fields
Wave to her as she drifts past on a gentle zephyr.
“Hmmm,” Q thinks to herself.
“This isn’t as bad as they said it was going to be.”
Just then she sees behind her on the left side of the road
A dry coconut husk pedalling slowly after her on a red unicycle.
“No problem,” says Q, steering to the right.
But over the brow of hill, on the right side of the road,
Hurtles the villainous Lord Lux in a satin jump suit
On a flaming jet powered blue chopped hog
Carrying two sneering Coalition heavies in his sidecar.
“No problem,” says Q, steering to the left.
She hovers along in the middle of the road.
But the dry coconut husk moves to the centre,
And the villainous Lord Lux moves to the centre too.
Mistress of Celestial Harmony Q realises with mounting horror
There is going to be no room
Between the red unicycle and the blue chopped hog,
As they bear relentlessly down on her
In the middle of the road.
Victor Billot will provide a series of weekly political Odes between now and the election campaign proper, when he attempts to win hearts and minds in Dunedin for the Alliance Party
