This was taken in the winter, a few months after my daughter’s birth in August 2020. It was during the Covid pandemic. I didn’t have any work and my anxiety levels were very high. I was isolated and my family couldn’t be there for me. It was just me and my child at home. That October, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. My health visitor prompted me to start therapy. I hadn’t picked up a camera for months and didn’t know where to begin. My therapist suggested I document how I was feeling by writing – but I chose photography. This was the first image I took, and the genesis of a series. To me, my gaze is the longing for home, for community – and for myself. I was lost in that moment, struggling with self-identity, but I also had hope that the light in my heart would come back.
What I see in the image now is a resilient mother: a woman who has a voice and who, despite everything that’s going on, wants to bring something to life. I hoped another mother would connect with it, that it might save someone else who was going through the same thing.
