There would probably be a gag in there somewhere if it wasn’t just so serious.
After all, Giovanni van Bronckhorst has been operating with a false No.9 in his squad ever since Amad Diallo took Jermain Defoe’s old shirt.
But, that irony aside, it’s hard to find much humour in the situation confronting the Dutchman and his horribly depleted squad as Rangers attempt to muster enough for another miraculous Europa League Thursday.
What a rotten time for luck to run out on them along with the only two strikers with the skill set to lead van Bronckhorst’s line as a centre forward.
To lose Alfredo Morelos to injury was a hammer blow going into the final stretches of a remarkable campaign. But for Kemar Roofe to find himself back on the treatment table as well?
No, that feels like one casualty too many for a side which must now attempt to survive a visit to the lions’ den in Leipzig before negotiating a safe passage in and out of Parkhead on Sunday and then tackling the Germans again in next week’s second leg.
In other words, Van Bronckhorst is about to embark on three gun fights armed with not much more than a pea shooter. All of which means the Rangers manager is going to have to get creative with his tactics and strategy if he is to keep his two main objectives still intact.
Celtic may have looked jaded and maybe even a little nervous in Dingwall on Sunday but they got out of the Highlands with the three points.
And that result leaves Van Bronckhorst right up against it with no margin for error when he crosses the Clyde for a high noon derby on Sunday. The truth of the matter is Ange Postecoglou and his players have this season’s title in the bag.
But, even so, the reigning champions won’t want to hand over their trophy behind enemy lines and Van Bronckhorst knows that nothing but a win there will do.
That won’t be the case on Thursday night though when he sends his side out in Germany looking to extend this European run all the way to the final.
On the contrary, a draw or even just a narrow first-leg defeat would be regarded as something of a triumph so long as Rangers are still in the tie when RB Leipzig arrive at Ibrox.
But it comes down to whatever the manager has up his sleeve to overcome the loss of his first-choice front men.
It did seem on Saturday at Fir Park that he was toying with the idea of taking a leaf out of Pep Guardiola’s book and deploying a side without a central striker as its focal point.
The false nine concept has worked out pretty well for Manchester City after all but, then again, Guardiola is hardly struggling for talented options and has also been doing it for a while.
Van Bronckhorst, though, has just days to work out which of his players are capable of taking such a role on board and, during the second half at Motherwell, it was Scott Arfield and then Joe Aribo who were deployed in that advanced central position.
It could be that one of them will be thrown into the deep end against Leipzig, assuming Van Bronckhorst has already seen enough of Fashion Sakala to suspect that the Zambian is not yet a natural fit there.
Sakala did lead the line for Rangers in Braga but operating with his back to goal looked like hard work for a player who wants to drive at opponents from wider areas. In fact, given the manner in which Sakala struggled to make any kind of impact that night in Portugal, Van Bronckhorst may think it would simply be too much of a risk.
But Sakala’s lightning pace could be better used on the wing.
Ryan Kent is another who could come into contention for the central striking role but he too might be better utilised on the left flank where he has proved himself more than capable of causing real damage on the European stage.
On Saturday, Diallo was given a chance to play his way into the manager’s thoughts but the youngster lasted only 30 first half minutes before being replaced by Calvin Bassey following Leon Balogun’s dismissal.
That it was Diallo’s half-hearted approach to protecting the ball which led to the defender’s red card, almost sums up the youngster’s time in Glasgow since his loan move from Manchester United. At just 19, time is on Diallo’s side and he may go on from here to justify the enormous fee which took him to Old Trafford from Atalanta. But he has looked anything but a £37million player in a Rangers shirt.
Cedric Itten is another man so far on the fringes he might struggle to get a game in training let alone force his way into the team. Given that he hasn’t even made the squad list for Europe, he can be discounted.
All of which points to Aribo and Arfield as the best options.
The Gers boss has some big decisions to make. Finding a new nine is the most important of the lot.
