When Nicky Wake was 49 and her husband Andy was 57 in 2020, they should have had long lives in front of them, full of opportunities and possibilities - but their time together was cut short. Ahead of the curve, the pair met online almost two decades earlier in 2002, and clicked instantly, marrying two years later before welcoming their son Finn in 2007.
But in 2017, their blissful world exploded, as Nicky returned home to find that Andy was suffering from chest pains. While he was reluctant to worry, she marched him to the doctors where they discovered he had suffered a heart attack. After treatment, he returned home, but four days later, he suffered another heart attack.
Suddenly, their new life was one which almost felt unbearable, as Andy suffered a catastrophic brain injury and required around-the-clock care. Then three years later, just before the pandemic, Nicky went from being a wife to a widow - and everything changed.
Not one to dwell where it doesn't help, she started navigating how to move forward with her life following his tragic death.
She isn't doing it alone though, as she wants to help others find happiness too by creating a platform for widows that is much more than just a dating site.
We tend to stereotype widowers as elderly people, but according to UK statistics, almost 100,000 people a year lose their husband or wife before the age of 50.
Prior to Andy's death, Nicky worked in events and Andy was in a high-flying career as head of press for Greater Manchester Police.
She created her own events business and he helped her get it off the ground, which led to him quitting his career with the police to work with her full-time for the following 10 years.
As the business went from strength to strength, Andy took a step back and became the "world's most devoted house husband," Nicky, of Bury, Greater Manchester, says.
The mum-of-one was able to travel across the country delivering events, while he focused on writing a novel at home and raising their child - cooking every meal and doing every school run.
He held their life together and looked after Nicky and their son, she says.
"Andy was such a wonderful soul and I'm grateful for every second of my life I had with him," Nicky tells The Mirror.
"He was a beautiful character, I joked he was the 'John to my Yoko'; we were meant to be together, he was my absolute soulmate. He was very politically minded and had real morals, I just loved him from the minute I met him.
"Two dates and I instantly knew I was going to marry him and I know he thought the same of me."
Nicky describes Andy as having been very laid back and healthy, never needing to go to the doctors in the time she knew him, although admits he was no gym bunny.
But when she returned home from a trip away in London with work in 2017, her blissful life imploded.
He told her he'd been having chest pains.
"My blood ran cold," she remembers. "I had a terrible feeling.
"He was a typical man and didn't like to talk about health things, but I marched him to the doctors."
They claimed he was suffering from stress, but Nicky was not convinced.
She insisted he underwent an ECG - and doctors discovered he was experiencing a heart attack.
He recovered in hospital and was fitted with a stent - a short, wire mesh tube that acts like a scaffold to help keep an artery open.
"After about four days I took him home, thinking we'd got away with it, thinking everything was fine," Nicky explains.
But that night, he had another heart attack.
Whilst waiting for the ambulance to arrive, she performed CPR and although her efforts kept him alive, Andy's brain was starved of oxygen and as a result, suffered a catastrophic brain injury.
What followed was three weeks of bedside agony, hoping for a miracle and after multiple resuscitation attempts, it became clear that Andy was unable to communicate or walk.
He moved into a specialist brain injury unit at a residential home where he needed 24-hour care, leaving Nicky to pick up the pieces at home, and was forced to learn how to parent solo.
With his condition, Andy could sometimes be aggressive and often mistook Nicky for his mum.
A consultant once explained it as like imagining a filing cabinet being knocked over, where all the files are there but in the wrong order.
Nicky was forced to make the heartbreaking decision to not let Finn see his father in that way, and instead have a lasting image of his dad to be a happy one.
And to add insult to injury, as Nicky puts it, she had to deal with a mountain of paperwork and legal wranglings as neither Andy nor Nicky had sorted wills, while their savings from the business were in a bank account under Andy's name only.
Looking back, Nicky feels responsible for the final three years of his life in the care home because it was her that carried out the CPR.
"I found going incredibly distressing," she admits. "Seeing the man you love as less than a shadow of his former self was utterly heartbreaking. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
"In some ways, there is a sense of regret - he would have hated every second of wherever he ended up.
"It was utterly heartbreaking seeing my beautiful gorgeous husband massively disabled.
"It was like we were in limbo. I knew that we were never going to get a happy ending and that he was never getting better."
She adds: "Having to solo parent was a whole new world for me; I couldn't cook! It was possibly the most incredibly challenging period of my life."
Sometimes on a visit to the home, she would have a breakthrough moment with Andy, which happened on the last visit she had before his death.
"I got on the bed with him and we cuddled. It was gorgeous, so poignant, and that's the memory I take away from it," she says, holding back tears.
In 2020, as Covid was making headlines, Andy contracted the virus and died. Nicky then had to adopt a new identity - she was a widow at 49.
She thought she'd already grieved the loss of her husband, but when his death actually came, it hit her like a "steam train".
And what's worse, is that she and her son were isolated from friends and family amid the lockdown restrictions.
They welcomed a puppy into their home to help them overcome the huge void in their lives, and Nicky eventually started going on dates.
"It wasn't until I finally lost him that I felt I could look at that as an option," Nicky admits.
"In my mind, I lost my husband five years ago. Timelines for widows can be really complex.
"I thought I'd put all that [online dating] behind me but apparently not. How did I find someone who is my next soulmate?
"And modern dating has moved on so much... Tinder is like the wild west out there.
"I've used Tinder, Bumble, Hinge - I've had some fun dates but been sent inappropriate photographs.
"It's what made me think, 'there had to be a better way'."
Another challenge to overcome was when to drop it into conversation with her dates that she was a widow, with it being an "elephant in the room".
Meanwhile, Nicky had been attending events with support group - Widowed and Young - and learnt to embrace her new status.
She gained the confidence to make it clear on her dating profiles but found that she connected with other widows on a deeper level.
"I go to a lot of their social events and I've seen that widows instantly connect, there's an emotional shorthand there," she explains.
That deeper understanding sparked the idea of her next business, Chapter 2 - the UK's first community and dating app for widows and widowers, set to launch in the UK on November 23.
People can choose to use the platform to find love or companionship and friendship.
"It's much more than a dating app; it's a community," Nicky states.
"Chapter 2 means different things to different people.
"If I can help some people find joy again, which I was bereft of for five years, that would help me make sense of my loss almost.
"We're all navigating this horrible world that none of us wanted to be a part of.
"What I'm doing is trying to help people find joy again and realise that they can move into a different chapter but still respect what's gone before.
"At no point do we use the word 'move on', it's 'move forward.'"
The platform will act as a forum and community for widows, and alongside servings as a dating site, there will be features including a legal and financial support section, an emotional support section with articles on grief and bereavement, a section of solo parenting and how to navigate blended families and children's grief.
Seeing as a majority of her customers will have never used online dating, Nicky has made it her prerogative to ensure it's a safe space online.
There's a detailed sign-up process, photos must be taken within the last 12 months, there's a code of conduct, and even the opportunity to report profiles.
With no age limit, Nicky is hoping to marry off a pair of octogenarians.
And down the line, she hopes to host socials using her experience in event management.
"I'm hoping I find my chapter two," Nicky comments on whether she thinks she'll find love again.
"I think that that's around the corner out there somewhere, but I've certainly not found it on Tinder, Bumble, or any of those.
"Nothing makes me happier than helping other people find joy, but if I can find the joy on the way, that would be lovely."
For more information on Chapter 2, head to their website here www.chapter2dating.co.uk.
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